Sexual Cruelty: Girls Who Are Raped
by Unknown


GENERAL INTRODUCTION 

As a Doctor of Psychiatry, I have often noted the lasting effect that the 
first sexual encounter can have on my female patients. All too often, that 
first, irremediable breaking of the seal will stamp an indelible, and 
sometimes traumatic, image on the impressionable mind of the devirginized 
woman. Especially if the woman ought "more properly to be described as a 
mere girl. 

The women I met with were of varying ages. A few were no more than little 
girls. One, in fact, had her first taste of sexual congress at the 
incredible age of nine. More incredible than that, her first partner was her 
ten year old brother. But more incredible still, she seemed not to suffer 
from the experience: if anything, she seemed to enjoy it! 

Then there is the case of Ruby D., who lost her virginity to a gang of 
high-school football players at an after-game orgy. She was not much older 
than the first girl I mentioned, and her reaction was even more brazen. 

A rather different case was that of Olga O., a middle-aged librarian who had 
a sickening experience at the age of thirty-five when she was assaulted by a 
feeble-minded janitor at closing time in a remote comer of the stacks. The 
experience, however, seems to have served her well in the long run. 

I spoke with a number of other women in the course of my researches, and 
feel I have gained a new perspective on a universal problem. My results 
cover the whole gamut of feminine reactions, and will hopefully prove 
informative and edifying to the mature readers for whom this book was 
written. 

* * * 

CASE HISTORY ONE 

Subject: Joyce G. Age: Sixteen 

INTERVIEW ONE 

Joyce is a pretty girl with light blonde hair that combs smartly around her 
face, and a smile, It is easy to see how a man, even a man much older than 
her, could see her as a very desirable sexual object. 

Joyce is proportioned well, with a tall body, long legs, high buttocks, full 
bosom, and very pale delicate skin. She came to my office dressed in a 
conservative outfit, but her latent sexuality was always apparent. 

She was rather amiable and easy-going, wanting to tell me the experience, 
wanting to get it out of her mind in some way. The following case reveals 
aspects of what it means to be de-flowered in our society, especially by a 
man older and more experienced. 

Well, Doc, I guess I'm here because of the trauma. That's not my word, but 
it applies I think. My father said that. He said that the incident was a 
trauma. Of course, he didn't know, and I didn't tell him, that it wasn't a 
trauma at all. I mean, I guess you could say I was forced, if you want to 
push it, but you could also say Mr. Ross was forced. I mean, I really teased 
him. 

Mr. Ross is my history teacher at school, and he's in his forties or so, and 
he's really a nice guy. Well, I had a crush on him at the beginning of the 
year, and it was getting out of hand, like, every time he'd call on me I'd 
fluster and gaggle, even if I had the answer to the question right on hand. 
It was getting insane, but it was funny also, you know? 

Alright, I guess you don't want to hear the funny parts. Anyway, I was doing 
a lot of flirting in those days, and with anyone who turned me on. A lot of 
the boys at school were just noticing me. I mean, when the term ended last 
year, I didn't look quite like this. My breasts got big over the summer. It 
was really strange. All of a sudden my hips got very rounded, and my breasts 
finally started to pop out nice and perky. Well, I was delighted with myself 
when I got back to school, and it seemed that a lot of the boys there felt 
the same way I did about me. They thought I was super. 

It was interesting and fun, you know? I mean, last year I'd had some 
attention. But I was only fifteen, and you know, it wasn't the same. This 
year, everyone at once seemed to notice that I was hot stuff. 

Mr. Ross noticed it with a wide-eyed look of approval, and he started 
speaking to me differently. I mean, his voice got lower and his words got 
softer, and he would really flirt with me. 

Of course I saw it coming. I mean, I encouraged it. I would wear really 
revealing blouses. You know the kind of blouses that sort of drape over a 
girl's breasts? Well, I wore those all the time, only now I had my big 
breasts for the material to drape over, and I was an eye-stopper of the 
first order. 

Mr. Ross had me after class for a conference. Now, I'm going back about two 
months, I guess, because the whole thing exploded after a few weeks, and 
since then my parents have been getting progressively difficult, wanting to 
know where I am all the time and things like that. 

Anyway, Mr. Ross had me stay for a conference, and there was nobody else in 
his office, so he suggested I come up and we can talk. 

"About what, Mr. Ross?" 

He acted occupied, and just told me to meet him there in fifteen minutes, 
and then he started straightening out papers on his desk, so I just left the 
room and went up to his office. 

I had to wait outside because it was locked, but he came up in about five 
minutes and opened the door. 

Mr. Ross is a fine looking man, with a mustache and gray and black hair, and 
a good build. He doesn't look like what you think a teacher should look like 
at all. 

I sat down, and he moved his chair around, so that he wasn't behind his 
desk. I suspected he was doing that so he could look at my legs, but I was 
pleased, and flirted. I crossed my legs and showed him some of my creamy 
thigh, and he responded. It was strange. I mean, being alone with him, I 
realized that I was affecting him very strongly. Really strongly! He was 
having a hard time staying calm. 

I guess I should say that at this point my sexual experience was nil. I had 
never even let a boy touch my tits before. I mean, I'd wanted to, but I'd 
just blossomed, just become really attractive to boys, and I hadn't gotten 
around to it yet. 

Well, I could see very easily that something was coming, but I didn't know 
what. He was just so tense, and at the same time, trying to act like he was 
just talking to me about my term project. It was like, maybe a month into 
the term, and that shit shouldn't even come up for another month or so. That 
was the clue though. That was how I knew what he really wanted. That, and 
his eyes on my body, on my breasts. 

"You really got pretty, didn't you, Joyce?" he asked me, a sly look on his 
face. "Well, thank you!" 

I flushed. I wasn't used to an older man looking at me like that. 

"Tell me, have you had sex yet?" 

That was a shocker, the way he just let it roll out like that. He was 
smoking a cigarette and trying not to look at me as he said that, but then 
his eyes met mine, and it was me that tried not to look at him. 

"Ann, no. Not really." 

"Not really? A beautiful girl like you." 

"Well, I just haven't gotten around to it, and I think maybe I'm a little 
young for it, anyway. You know, I mean, it can get you in trouble." 

Actually, my mother insisted that I go on the pill over the summer. I guess 
she knew I was budding, and there was the possibility of some man noticing 
it as well as her. 

"Yes, that's true. You have to be careful who you pick to play around with." 

He was obviously suggesting himself now, and I can't help it, but I was 
flattered. I mean, here was this man who had his shit together, not like 
some high school punk, and he was interested in me. It made me feel like a 
woman. 

"Well, yes. I suppose I'll have to be careful." 

Mr. Ross smiled. 

"Do you know my first name?" 

"Ernie!" 

I'd read it on his program book. 

"That's right. You can call me Ernie when nobody is around. When we're in 
class, I'm Mr. Ross again. Okay?" 

I smiled. I was really flattered, just by him taking his time with me. 

"Sure, Ernie." 

I giggled when I said it the first time, and he told me I had really pretty 
eyes and a great smile, and he said that if I was taught right, I'd be one 
sexy item in no time flat. 

"What do you mean?" 

"Well, if the right man shows you what love is about, it'll help a lot, 
baby. You must know that." 

"Well, I hadn't thought about it," I lied. 

"Time to think about it, Joyce." 

At this point he got up and told me to get up, and I did. We stood facing 
each other, and I half-wondered if he was going to make a move, or tell me 
we'd be speaking again in the near future. 

I should have known better. He just grabbed me and pulled me towards him, 
and the next thing I know he's teaching me how to kiss. Now, I mean really 
kiss. 

He was sucking on my lips, his tongue running over my teeth, and he was 
beginning to run his hands over my body, over my breasts and groin. 

You know, if it was somebody else I might have stopped him, but I was so 
flattered, I thought I'd let it run for awhile. What the hell, I figured? 

He was getting hot quickly. His hands were all over me, and his breath was 
coming in bursts of steam. His hands were quick, and he was under my skirt, 
his fingers on my pussy, moving my panties aside skillfully. 

"Ohhhhh, you are one sweet little bitch," he said, and I thought that he 
betrayed himself, that he didn't mean to say that at all. 

I was starting to get very hot, and I couldn't believe it was happening so 
quickly, and right in his office. What he did was amazing. He lifted me up, 
so that my ass was on his desk, and then Mr. Ross, Ernie, got down on his 
knees, spreading my legs around his neck so that his lips were right up to 
my pussy. 

I got a little afraid, and I tried to get up, but he held me down with heavy 
hands, and soon he was licking at my pussy with his tongue, and there was no 
way I wanted to get up! 

That was my first experience with real sex. I had masturbated a few times, 
but that didn't feel anything like having this man's tongue on my pussy. He 
was a master at sucking a girl's pussy, and that's for sure. 

I was gasping, moaning, my hair all messed up, my make-up running as tears 
of joy came to my eyes, and yet, through this whole thing, I was afraid. 
Every once in awhile, I would insist that he stop, and I would cry and beg 
him to stop. 

He couldn't even hear me and I knew it. My inner thighs were around his 
ears, and all he could hear was a low moan when I spoke. 

I was clutching at his hair, holding his head down on my pussy as he lapped 
at me. 

Doc, all I can say is that that man is one hell of a cuntsucker. I hope that 
term doesn't bother you. When he looked up from my pussy, his whole face was 
wet. 

"That's your pussy dew," he said, a dreamy look on his face. 

I stroked his cheek, feeling a new sensation. I wanted to force his head 
back into my crotch, but I didn't know how to be aggressive. 

In a second, he looked down and began to dig his tongue into my twat again. 
Mostly, he was pounding his tongue down on my clitoris, but his tongue was 
also sliding into the lips of my twat, and even sliding back to my asshole. 
When he licked my asshole I felt a warmth rise in me that I can still 
remember vividly. 

Then, I felt his finger slide into my asshole, and I was astonished, but I 
was also having my very first orgasm, so my reaction was to sigh and moan 
and I guess, in effect, encourage him. 

He was lapping my pussy and sliding his finger in and out of my asshole, 
when my orgasm took over and ran through my body, flooding my sensations and 
making me crazy with delight. 

"Ohhhh, Ernie! That feels so good, Ernie!" 

Again, he couldn't hear me. My legs were really tight to his ears. 

He looked up at me, and he was watching my breasts heave, so I made them 
dance really special for him. He started lapping really hard, and in a 
matter of a few seconds I was having another orgasm, not knowing where they 
were coming from. Before I'd walked into that room, I'd never had an orgasm 
in my life. 

It was strange, but let me tell you it was fun! Ernie lapped at my pussy for 
a long time, a real long time, but then he got up and took his pants off. 

"What if someone comes in?" I said. 

I was just looking for a reason to stop. I'd had my pleasure, and I knew he 
was going to want his. I didn't know what he wanted from me, exactly, but I 
had a good idea, and I was so hung-up that despite all the pleasure he'd 
given me, I didn't want to fuck for him. Not then. I mean, I wanted to, but 
I wasn't ready to! 

It was such a strange feeling. As soon as I saw his big cock, I was struck 
by fear. Before I saw it, I was thinking that if his tongue feels good, his 
cock's going to feel great. But then, when I took one look at his cock, I 
was afraid. 

Well, that didn't stop him. That's when I really got scared, when I realized 
that Ernie, Mr. Ross, was no longer the calm teacher I knew him as. He was a 
flaming ball of passion, and he was going to stick that cock into me no 
matter what I did. 

I tried to struggle, but he had me flat on his big desk, and he had a long, 
strong hand on my body. I mean, I could fight, but just so much. 

Ernie moved quickly, getting me hot again with his fingers, and this time I 
learned what a good lover can do with his hands. He had fingers all over me. 
On my clitoris, on my asshole, in my pussy. 

It felt like a high electrical charge passing through me or something. I 
mean, it was really that weird, you know? Then, and this is the strangest 
part I guess, I stopped him and told him not to put his cock in me. 

"I'm a virgin!" 

It was weird. As on-fire as he was, he stopped and looked at me a moment. 
"You're crying, Joyce." 

He started to lick the tears and sweat off of my face, and then he began to 
poke his cock around my pussy, holding me down on the desk with his hands on 
my waist. His hands were strong as hell, and I was losing the will to fight, 
anyway. 

His cock entered the lips of my pussy, and he told me that it was going to 
hurt a little for a minute, but that it would go away soon. It would be fine 
soon. I believed that, and I just held my breath while he forced it in. 

Ohhhh, Doc! That big cock sank into me and I was on fire with him. It felt 
even better than his tongue, and it was moving fast. In and out, up and 
down, his whole body's force behind each stroke. It was insane the way he 
was letting me have it. His cock was so quick and slick I had an orgasm 
within the first couple of seconds! 

That meant three orgasms in a matter of less than an hour. Three orgasms in 
my whole life, and all right then and there. He was leaving a very strong 
impression on me, to say the very fucking least! 

Well, he was also going through something very nice for himself and I could 
see that. 

"Joyce, baby, I love the hot balls of your ass, baby. Lift those cheeks to 
me, bitch. You really have a hot young body, baby," he moaned. 

I was enjoying listening to him, and it was so nice to come with him telling 
me what a hot saucy cunt I had. It was the most sexual experience I ever 
had. You know, I hear a lot of people are let down by their first experience 
with sex. I mean, they've been told that it's great, and then it's no big 
deal, or something like that. 

Well, my experience has been the opposite. I mean, it was so sexually strong 
and pleasant, I've been trying to duplicate it ever since. 

That's another story, Doc. I'll get back to Ernie. He'd popped my cherry, 
and he was still digging it into me, his hands cupping my ass, his cock 
driving into me at a furious pace. 

"You have the tightest pussy I've ever fucked, Joyce," he moaned. 

His big cock was moving like a steam shovel as he rammed it deep in my cunt. 
I was beginning to glow with pleasure, when I felt his finger slide in my 
ass again, and that set me off. 

This time, my orgasm was so severe that I took him with me. That's how he 
acted, anyhow, like it was a reaction. I tightened my twat around his cock a 
lot when I came, and then I could feel him pulse. 

That was really nice! As his cock started to pulse, I realized that he was 
coming. Of course, it helped that he told me. 

"That's it, Joyce, you sweet little bitch. I'm going to come in that hot 
pussy!" 

His cock was shooting cream into me, and I was gasping, hysterical with 
pleasure, as he moaned and fucked away at me! 

He finished, and his weight came down on me as he realized how exhausted he 
was. It was strange. I mean, we were both covered with sweat, and when he 
sank down on me my tits flattened out and his big chest and my chest were 
really tight together. It felt good. 

I could feel his cock inside me, and I tightened my twat, just to see if he 
would notice. His cock was getting soft, and I wasn't sure if he would even 
notice that I did it. 

He noticed! He smiled, and he started moving in and out again, his cock 
getting hard all at once, right inside me! That was great! 

Well, he fucked me again, but this time he lifted my long leg over his head 
and spun me around, so that his cock was in me from behind. 

That was strange. I didn't know that could even be done. 

"I love to watch those pointy little tits bounce," he moaned, as his cock 
started to dig into me, this time from the rear. 

He told me to push the cheeks of my ass together. 

"I love to bounce on that sweet pale ass, baby!" he moaned. 

I started to wiggle my ass every time his balls and belly came down on it, 
driving his cock in my pussy. 

"Joyce, keep that twat tight for me, baby!" he moaned, digging it into me! 

"Ohhh, Ernie. I love that hot cock!" 

You see, I wasn't pretending I didn't want it anymore, not even to myself. I 
was just following my own impulses, and they were to fuck, fuck, and then 
fuck a little! 

I hope that doesn't sound crude, Doctor, but that was the way it was. 
Actually, it sounds healthy, doesn't it? Well, fuck all that, because it's 
all a matter of opinion. 

Anyway, I came quickly on the second fuck, because the new angle afforded by 
fucking backwards was really groovy to feel. 

He was holding back, so that he could lick at my profile and run his hands 
over my pointy tits and tight round ass as long as he could. That's what he 
told me at least. 

Soon though, he couldn't hold it in any longer, and his cock started to 
erupt right on the spot, shooting out hot come into my pussy. 

That was a pleasure, to feel my pussy taking in all that hot sauce, and I 
danced for him really nice as I felt the heat of his shot! 

"Ohhhhh, that feels good, Ernie!" 

My breasts were flat to the wood of the desk, as was my belly, and I was 
uncomfortable to be sure, but I didn't even realize all that until it was 
over. As soon as we'd both had an orgasm, it hit me that I was damp and 
sweaty, as well as cold and sore from the wood of the table. I was also sore 
from his big cock, and that hit me quickly, as soon as he let it drop out. 

"How are you?" he asked, drying my face off with one of those awful 
industrial towels. 

"Wow!" 

That's all I said. I sat down and he started to help me, almost force me, to 
get dressed. That was because I was in a stupor, sort of, and I couldn't 
seem to move by myself. It was strange as hell, let me tell you. Oh, is my 
time up? Well, I'll fill you in on the rest next session, Doc. Thanks for 
everything. 

INTERVIEW TWO 

Well, Doc, me and Ernie got to be very good friends to say the fucking 
least. I mean, I was always hot to fuck him, and that turned out to be a 
drag because he wasn't always able. He has a wife and another mistress. 

I learned quickly enough, that I was just part of his harem, but that didn't 
upset me, because he explained it away. You have to realize, Doc, that this 
man had a terrible amount of control over my head. I mean, he was my 
teacher, my lover, and the most experienced man I'd ever come across. He was 
smarter and smoother than my father, than my two brothers, than anyone I 
knew! 

And he was so good looking, really. He's old, but he's so sharp, and his 
body is really tight. 

"I want you to be my special girl, Joyce," he said. I didn't know what he 
was getting at, but he got their quick enough. 

"I want you to learn to suck cock really nice. I want you to be my 
cocksucker!" 

He could say things like that to me because he knew I was going to take it, 
and like it. He could tell right off that I got horny when he said dirty 
things, and he liked saying them. I could tell that. 

On this particular day, the day he decided that I was to be his cocksucker, 
he was making me stand before him nude, while he stood there, pinching my 
taut nipples and letting me know how beautiful he thought I was. 

"I'm going to show you how a cock likes to be sucked," he said. 

He moved his lips down to my nipples, and he grasped one in his mouth, 
beating on the taut nipple with his tongue, really making me dizzy with a 
new sensation. 

"How do you like that on your nipple?" he asked me. 

"Ernie, you know that feels great!" 

He smiled. He knew all about it. He was just playing with me most of the 
time when he asked me how something felt, because he already knew all about 
it. 

He started to show me how he was whipping my nipples with his tongue, 
fluttering his tongue over them, and then circling the halo of my nipple 
with his tongue. 

"Doesn't that feel nice, baby?" 

"Ohhhhhh, yes!" 

He stopped and looked up, taking my nipples in his fingers now, to keep them 
taut. 

"Well, get down and do that to my cock, baby. Your lips were made for 
sucking cock, Joyce!" 

He was cupping my chin and looking directly into my eyes .and at my lips 
when he said that, and I was amazed at the passion in his eyes. 

I could feel his cock pulse in my hand, and I knew, as he put his hands on 
my shoulders and started to lower me down to his cock, that I would have to 
perform. That is, I would have to perform if I wanted to be his favorite. 
That's what he wanted from me, and that's what I decided to be! 

I allowed him to place me, and he moved me slowly to the floor, on my knees. 
We were in a hotel room, and there was a thick rug, so it didn't bother me 
in the least to be on my knees. Well, his cock was big and hard. 

"Lick my balls first, Joyce. Put my balls in your mouth and lap at them!" 

I did what I was told, and I started to like it at once. I was thinking of 
how great it felt when he ate my pussy for me, and I wanted to make him feel 
at least as good as he made me feel, so I was making one hell of an effort. 

I let his balls slide in my mouth and sucked on them as long as I could, and 
he told me to take my fingertips lightly, and move them along the shaft of 
his cock. 

"Rub my cock on your face, Joyce. I want to see it on your nose and cheeks, 
on your neck." 

His balls slid but of my mouth, and he started to rub his cock around on my 
face, telling me I was going to be the hottest bitch that ever got her lips 
on his cock. 

He suddenly wasn't fooling around or being affectionate. All at once, he 
grasped my head firmly with his hands, and made my lips go to his cock. 

"Start with a lick!" 

My tongue came out and circled his big cock, dancing over the very tip. 
There was some lube on his cock, and I licked it off, which he really liked. 

He moved me away and smeared the lube all over my full lips, and he said 
that he wanted me to flutter my tongue over his cock the way he fluttered 
his tongue over my nipples. 

Well, that's what I did, and did he ever go wild! It was a heavy moment in 
my life, because I realized that I could provide a lot of pleasure with a 
minimum of effort. One little lick in the right spot, and he would dance 
like a maniac. I do mean a maniac! 

He was humping his big cock into my mouth in no time, fucking me so hard I 
lost the ability to flutter my tongue. My tongue was just stuck on the 
bottom of my mouth, as his big cock filled up my whole mouth. 

"Take that cock in deep, Joyce. I love to see your sweet lips around my 
cock, baby!" 

"Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm." 

"I love the way your hair gets wild, and your lips pout when you suck, 
woman." 

It was nice to have him call me his woman. I mean, I always thought I was 
his little girl, and his Women were kept apart. Now, I realized that I was 
his woman, and maybe if I played it right, I'd be his favorite woman at 
that. 

I let my tongue go to work again. The way I did that was to grab the thick 
shaft of his cock in my fist, and just let the tip charge in and out of my 
mouth. That way, I had the control I needed to do to his cock what he did to 
my nipple. Namely, whip it with my tongue! 

He moaned and watched my mouth carefully, and soon I saw his face flood with 
a warm look, as he seemed to be melting with the sight of what was happening 
to him. 

"I'm going to come in that beautiful mouth of yours, baby," he moan. 

I could feel his cock pulsing in my fist. I figured, if it felt good to 
tighten my pussy when I was fucking him, it must be the same if I just keep 
my fist tight around his cock as my tongue whipped the flaming tip of his 
rod. 

That's what I did. I squeezed the hard shaft of his rod, and he appreciated 
that. I must say he lit up when I got the hang of it. 

He started to shoot all at once, and my first reaction was to wonder what I 
was supposed to do with the hot liquid that was jetting onto my tongue. 

"Drink it down, baby.. It's hot sauce for your tongue," he moaned. 

I was excited, and followed his suggestion, finding it to be bittersweet. I 
was moaning, my nostrils flaring to take in air, my whole body sweating, and 
he was above me, his hand on my brow. 

"Sweet Joyce. I knew you'd be a great cocksucker. Lick it off for me, baby!" 

Licking the come off his cock, I started to wonder what he was going to do 
now. Was he going to fuck me again? Was he going to make me do this now, all 
the time? I liked his cock in my mouth, but certainly not all the time. I 
mean, I wanted it in my pussy too. 

We worked it out. I mean, he did want me to be his cocksucker mostly, and 
that was that. But we worked it out! He was giving me some cock when I 
wanted it, and he was always ready to lick my pussy, which he said he had a 
taste for. 

Then, the lid blew. Happened like this. One of my mother's friends was 
having an affair with a man from another town, and they were using the same 
damn hotel that Ernie and I used. 

My parents got the information at once, and I was in trouble. Of course, 
they didn't know who the man was, but they made me talk. You know how it is 
with parents, especially when something so outrageous happens. They have a 
way of making you miserable until you talk. 

Well, I had to give Ernie's name, even, and now he's in a mess as well as 
me. It's too bad. I said he didn't rape me, and I don't think he did. It 
seems though, that the law has another term for it, and he's in trouble 
anyway. I was only fifteen when it happened. I just turned sixteen. I hope 
nothing bad happens to Ernie, because he didn't hurt me. 

I know his wife didn't leave him, so I think it's just a matter of him maybe 
losing his job. Big hassle, but better than anything worse. Like, my father 
could press charges. At least that's what he threatens to do if I ever see 
Ernie again. 

Now, I find that I can't get the right kind of sex. I mean, those boys at 
school are really silly, and you have to lead them by the hand if you want 
them to get anything done for you. Pain in the ass. I wish I had Ernie back, 
right now! 

CONCLUSION 

This case is typical in that the man who took the virginity of the girl was 
someone in a condition of power over her. Sometimes this power is love, but 
more often, it is a situational power. A man in a particular role, is more 
likely to get his way with a young virgin, than a man in another role. For 
instance, a teacher has his pick of temptations, and his obvious power, with 
which he can manipulate and arrange the seduction. 

Joyce, as with most girls in a situation like that, found herself flattered 
that such an important person should desire her. The fact that his 
importance was really quite limited, didn't enter her mind at all. 

According to what I was told, Joyce didn't instigate the incident by 
flirting or posing for him to make him want her. From what I gathered, her 
delightful appearance and sexiness instigated Ernie more than anything she 
might have done or said. 

Of course, this is largely a crime without a victim. Joyce is grateful to 
Ernie for teaching her so much so quickly, and Ernie, even if he didn't 
respect the law, even if he did use his power without professional ethics, 
did no direct harm to the girl, other than making an excellent lover out of 
her. 

I told Joyce to worry less about the whole thing, and it would eventually 
work out. I told her to feel no responsibility for Ernie, who is old enough 
to know he is taking chances, and to continue her search for satisfaction in 
bed. 

She appreciated my honesty, and left with a smile. No further appointments 
were necessary. 

CASE HISTORY TWO 

Subject: Melanie Z. Age: Sixteen 

INTERVIEW ONE 

Melanie is a cute girl with frosted blonde and brown hair cut short around 
her pixie face. Her wide hazel eyes are beautiful, and again with a case 
like this, she appears to be very sexual, and it is easy to understand how 
an older man could find her attractive. 

In this case it was her stepfather. The man married her mother, moving in on 
their quiet household. 

Melanie's ability to articulate her problems, lets this case unfold rather 
easily. 

Well, Doc, when Frank moved in I was pleased. I mean, my mother, Lin, had 
been alone long enough. I knew she was happy to have me around since the 
divorce, but she still needed a man. There was no way she could hide that 
from me. I mean, I'm too old to not know that a woman needs a man after 
she's been married. 

Frank came along, and they hit it off, and he is one hell of a looker. Sharp 
and smooth, he looks like a movie star. She fell for him, and I think the 
problem was that she fell too hard, because he started to get demanding 
right away. 

Hearing them in their bedroom one night, I snuck out into the hallway to 
hear what they were saying. 

"I want to sleep with her. She looks just like you. I want to make love to 
both of you at the same time." 

"We can't do that, Frank. She's just a child!" Lin said. 

That's when I realized that they were talking about me. I was flattered that 
he wanted me, but I mean, I was also sorry for Lin. I mean, she finally had 
her man, and he wanted me. 

Now, as far as sex was concerned, a little light petting was all I was into, 
although I had masturbated, and I even had an orgasm once. Nothing heavier 
than that though, and you have to admit that's nothing. I went back to my 
room, but later I heard them both moaning, and I went back into the hall. 

I could all but see and taste it. The bedsprings were making squeaking 
noises, and their moans were strong and loud, and I just knew what they were 
doing. I started to masturbate right there in the hallway. I figured if they 
stopped I could hear them, and I relaxed. 

I almost came right there, just with my finger on my clitoris, and my other 
hand on my nipples. But then they stopped, and I figured it was time to 
leave before someone went to the bathroom or something. I didn't need that! 

Well, the next few days were quiet, but then one day Frank stayed home from 
work. He said he was sick. I knew he was full of shit, but Lin didn't. She 
went to work. 

Now, this was during a spring break, so I had no school or anything and my 
days were my own. 

"Want some lunch?" he asked, knocking on my door. 

"Sure, be right out!" 

I was trying to be sexy I guess. I put on a tee shirt, knowing that my perky 
tits and cute nipples would show through it. I even pinched my nipples a 
little to make them really taut when he first saw me. 

My purpose though, was simply to flirt. I didn't think it would get out of 
hand. It did. And quickly. 

For one thing, I could see as soon as I came down that he hadn't been near 
the kitchen. What kind of lunch could he have in mind? 

"Frank, did you fix lunch?" 

He smiled and shook his head negative. 

"What happened?" 

"I got busy. I started having a daydream, Melanie," he said, sitting down on 
the couch in the living room, inviting me to sit down next to him. 

I sat down. I still didn't think anything serious was going to happen. 

"You know, you look just like your mother. I'll bet you're going to be a hot 
little piece in bed!" 

I was shocked. 

"What?" 

He laughed and pulled me close, and from that point on, it was out of my 
hands. 

Frank moved quickly. He pulled me down onto the couch so that I was 
stretched out, and he opened my legs. I was wearing tight jeans, but he 
yanked them off as if they were greased, and he started to work on my bush 
with his fingers. He was moving quickly, taking his big cock out and making 
me touch it. 

"Don't be afraid. I won't hurt you, you sweet child," he moaned. 

Let me tell you. I was afraid. His big cock was suspended over me, and he 
started poking it around my pussy at once. He hadn't even taken my clothes 
off really. I mean, just enough so that he could get at my crotch. My tee 
shirt was still on, although his hands were under it and on my breasts 
freely. 

His cock was too big, I thought, but as he continued to rub it around, and I 
got wet, I started to want it as much as he wanted to jab it into me. 

He started with a finger, digging in deep. That got me really wet, and he 
followed that with his cock so quickly I didn't know what the fuck hit me. 
It was strange. I mean, my first fuck, and it was happening before I 
realized it. 

Frank was pumping his hot cock into me again and again, and it hurt, but 
only for the first minute or so. Then, it was like a cloud of pleasure was 
passing through my head, and nothing hurt. 

At that point, everything that happened felt good. 

"Your pussy is so tight, baby. Just like your mother's hot cunt!" 

His hands were on the balls of my ass, and his cock was moving up and down 
so fast I was going crazy. 

"I'm going to come, baby! Just tighten that hot twat for me!" 

He lifted himself up on his expanded arms and started to shoot hot come into 
me. 

I felt his cock twitch, and I started to come also, only this time it wasn't 
the kind of orgasm I had with my fingers. This time, it was for real! 

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh, Frank!" 

He smiled. At that point I had given in, and he could tell I was getting as 
much pleasure as he was. 

Before I started to moan and beg him to fuck me harder, it was like he was 
raping me. But that changed quickly when he started to let me have the full 
force of that thundering cock. 

"Ohhhhhhhh, Frank. I'm exploding!" 

My pussy was tingling. New feelings, feelings I'd never felt, were emerging 
from my body. 

"Let that pussy stay tight for me, bitch!" 

Keeping my pussy tight around his cock, I started to grind my hips up. 

"I'm going to shoot in that hot twat!" 

His come was thick and hot, and it started to throb out of his cock almost 
at once. I came with him, because when he started to come his rhythm picked 
up, and he was really driving me out of my fucking mind. 

"Bitch, I love to fuck you!" 

Our fucking stopped as both of us came, and Frank got up off the couch. . 
"We'll have to tell Lin, and she'll have to agree to this," he said. 

I was more for keeping it to ourselves, and got upset. 

"We didn't do anything wrong, baby. It was natural. We just have to make 
your mother understand." 

Well, that's another story, and I'm exhausted. I guess we'll have to wait 
for next session, alright, Doc? 

INTERVIEW TWO 

At this point, Melanie had me thrown-off completely. I couldn't decide how 
much she'd invited the incident, or how aggressive Frank actually was. This 
next interview clarifies a lot of the issues obscured by early information. 

Well, Doc, Frank didn't tell Lin anything that night, and I figured maybe he 
re-considered. I was glad about that. I mean, the last thing I wanted to do 
was to break up a good marriage because Lin's new husband wanted to fuck me. 

But let me tell you, there was a strong feeling of lust in me every time I 
saw him after that. And I saw him all over the house. He let a few days go 
by without saying anything, but then one night I was asked into their 
bedroom, by Lin herself. 

"What?" I asked, arriving at the edge of their bed, looking innocent as 
hell. 

"You don't have to play games anymore," Lin said. 

"What?" 

"Just take off your robe and get into bed with us. I want to see if you're 
as hot as Frank seems to think you are," Lin said 

Well, I could tell it wasn't her idea. Frank was looking at me as though it 
was all cool and sweet. I just let my robe drop to the floor, and Frank took 
over. 

He told me to suck his cock, and as I did, he started to lap at Lin's bush. 

He told me his cock was like a lollipop, and that's the way I should treat 
it. 

"How's that?" I asked, licking the tip. 

"Just right!" 

Frank started to hump his cock into my mouth, and it really felt strange. As 
he was doing that, he was licking Lin's bush, and I saw Lin go wild. 

Lin is pretty. She does look like me, only her tits are bigger, and she's 
more mature, and watching those hot tits bounce around as she jerked and 
moaned, I envied her for being a woman, realizing more and more that I was 
just a little girl. 

Well, Lin was taking a lot of Frank's attention, but he was fucking my mouth 
with passion, and there was a strange chain reaction, because when Lin came, 
I felt the cock that was driving into my mouth, start to drive harder. 

Frank looked up from Lin's twat. 

"Suck on that big lollipop, baby!" 

I was sucking on it, but he wanted to watch, and that's what he did. 

Leaving Lin, he sat up and watched his big cock as it went in and out of my 
mouth. 

"Watch your little hot daughter, Lin!" 

Lin sat up, and they were both watching me suck his cock. I could feel his 
pulsing cock getting warm in my mouth, and I felt the hot liquid start to 
shoot out. 

It hit me quick, and started to run down the comers of my mouth and all over 
my face, as I took it out of my mouth and held it in my fist, letting it 
squirt wherever it was pointing, which was at me. 

"Sweet bitch. Put it back in your mouth!" 

I did, and I drank down the last of his orgasm. He was pleased, and he was 
stroking my hair, telling me that I was a good cocksucker. 

It was a strange incident. Lin seemed pleased enough with the way he'd 
sucked her cunt. Frank wasn't finished though. He wanted to see both of us 
on him at once, and the only way to do that was to have me suck his asshole, 
and Lin suck his cock. 

Well, I never heard of sucking an asshole before, but he was strong, and I 
could tell he really wanted it, so I did it. 

His body was wild, as Lin took his big cock deeply into her mouth. She was 
competing with me, for technique. That was the feeling I got. 

I was very exciting to see Lin with a big cock in her mouth. Aside from 
envy, I enjoyed the sight. 

Frank was holding her by her chin, watching her mouth slide around on his 
thick cock. 

Frank was also holding me, with one hand, telling me to lap at that hot 
asshole for him. 

"Get your tongue inside it!" 

He was freshly showered, so I didn't taste any shit, and I really got into 
giving him a good licking with my tongue. It was strange, because I thought 
he was going to buck me off at any time. 

All of a sudden, he started to buck and thrust, and I knew he was going to 
come in 

Lin's mouth. 

"Suck it up, Lin! It's good to have you both working on me!" he moaned. 

Lin was sliding off his cock, only to slide back on. He was petting her face 
as she stroked his long dick with her lips. 

He had a hand behind him, on my head, and he was holding mc tight to his 
asshole, still. 

"Give it to me, Melanie!" 

I licked at him as best as I could, and he just kept thrusting his cock into 
Lin's mouth. 

Suddenly, he exploded and I heard Lin moan as his cock shot bolts of come 
into her. 

"Take that, sweet bitch. You're as good as your daughter when it comes to 
sucking cock!" 

Lin swallowed his heavy cream, and I stopped licking his asshole. He 
released my hair and I fell to the bed. 

"You two were a good team. From now on you both share my bed!" Frank said. 

Well, for a few weeks it was strange. I mean, Frank slept in the middle, and 
he had his pick of two women every night. Sometimes he'd turn to his little 
virgin cherry. That's what he called me. Sometimes, he'd plow it into Lin. 

Sometimes, he'd do strange combinations, like fucking Lin between her big 
tits, and then giving me a chance to drink his come for him. 

It was strange, and let me tell you, Lin and 

I were never sure how to relate to each other. 

Now, I sleep in my room. I guess Lin finally insisted. Frank still drags me 
in for a blow-job or a quick fuck once in awhile, with Lin there. And if I'm 
alone with him, I know what to expect. Weird, isn't it, Doc? 

CONCLUSION 

The problems Melanie is having should in no way prove permanently traumatic. 
Her early experience with sex was intense and pleasurable, and her ability 
to enjoy it, proves her healthy outlook. 

The situation in the household is political, as though it were a simple 
question of whether or not two women can please one man, and themselves. 
This is a situation that lends itself to alienation between the mother and 
stepdaughter, and it could be dangerous as such. 

I told Melanie to try and find some lovers her own age, and teach them what 
she'd learned about sex, and to try and avoid competing with her mother. If 
she follows my advice, she should be healthy and fulfilled without 
difficulty. We have arranged another session in a few months, to determine 
whether or not she is being successful. 

CASE HISTORY THREE 

Subject: Lee P. Age: Sixteen 

INTERVIEW ONE 

I continued my research with a set of interviews involving a girl named Lee 
P. who looked much older than her sixteen years. She had apparently entered 
puberty at a precocious age, and informed me that she had her first period 
when she was only nine. Being so young at the time, she had not yet been 
warned about what to expect. The confusion and fear she felt then were 
certainly understandable. It is easy to understand her vulnerability, and 
all to easy to appreciate the ease with which her older brother took 
advantage of it. 

Although her case sounds shocking when you first hear its details, the 
unusual circumstances make it less difficult to interpret objectively. After 
all, her breasts were already beginning to develop, and her brother was 
having his own problems at the time. He, too, was just entering the early 
stages of puberty, and so it is difficult to feel much surprise at the 
sordid turn of events. 

She was reluctant to tell me her story, but over the course of a couple of 
interviews in the privacy of my office, she dropped her guard and related 
her tale to me in frighteningly explicit detail. 

In the following pages, I present a word by word transcription of her 
revelations. I think it did her a lot of good to get it all off her chest. I 
hope her story will provide a comparable service for the readers of this 
narrative. 

Well, Doctor, it's kind of hard for me to talk about this business. I mean, 
I had no idea what was happening to me at the time, and when I look back on 
the scene, I can't help feeling sort of disgusted by the whole affair. 

I was out in the woods with my brother Eddie. We were playing in a tree 
house he had built with his friends, pretending to be pirates in the crow's 
nest of a Spanish galleon. 

We were singing that silly song about sailing over the bounding mane when I 
felt my first cramps. I started to cry, and Eddie got very upset. He thought 
maybe he'd hurt me playing Bluebeard to my captured princess, and was afraid 
daddy would beat him for being so rough if I didn't stop squawking and ran 
home to tell our parents. 

He was pleading with me to stop crying, but I couldn't. I told him it wasn't 
his fault, and he shouldn't worry. I said there was something wrong with my 
stomach, because I didn't know the name yet for the places further down. 

Eddie wanted me to climb down from the tree house and go home, but I told 
him it hurt too much to go through all that, that I just wanted to lie down 
until it passed away. 

He looked worried, and thought it would help if we changed games. He decided 
we ought to be playing doctor as long as I was sick, and I figured we might 
as well, that maybe I'd get better quicker if we made a game out of my 
hurts. 

He asked me where it hurt most, and I told him it was in my stomach. He put 
his hand on my belly and said, does it hurt here? I told him no, it was 
lower down, and her kept moving his hand, asking me does it hurt here, does 
it hurt here? 

When his hands were on top of my dress, I started to scream. That's where it 
hurts, I said, and he lifted up my dress to take a look. 

Then it was his turn to scream. My panties were drenched in blood, and he 
stepped back to the wall of the little hut, his jaw hanging open all the 
while. 

Then I decided I'd better take a look myself, and saw the blood. I didn't 
know what to make of it, and cried. 

I didn't know what it meant, Doctor, I was getting hysterical and tried to 
make the blood stop squirting out of me by squeezing my legs hard together. 
But that only made me feel a new kind of pain. 

Well, actually, Doctor, it only felt like pain at first. It was a new kind 
of sensation, and what with the way I was feeling and all, I didn't know how 
else to make it register except to think of it as more pain. 

But as I squeezed my legs harder and harder, I began to tremble, and it 
wasn't only with pain. It felt good somehow, and I didn't know why. 

Eddie could tell something funny was going on, and I could see there was a 
little lump beginning to grow in his pants. I didn't know what that was, 
either, but because it was happening to him in the same place whatever it 
was--was happening to me, I thought maybe he'd caught my disease. I figured 
it was a disease, you know. What else could I think, under the 
circumstances? 

I better take these off, I said, and tugged off my panties. A few drops of 
red were dripping out of my wound onto the wooden boards of the hut, and 
Eddie stared at them, and at my wound, with amazing fascination. 

I hurt, too, he cried, you gave it to me! So take off your pants, too, I 
said. He did, and then I saw what was wrong. 

I'd seen his thing before, of course. We're brother and sister, after all, 
and we'd been taking baths together until a few months before that day in 
the hut. That's when Eddie's face began to break out in a scratchy down of 
little brown hairs. When that started to happen, around the time his voice 
began to change, too, well, mother decided we shouldn't take baths together 
anymore. Neither Eddie nor me understood why at the time, but we didn't want 
to say anything about it to mom or dad. 

Well, like I said, I'd seen his thing before, but it was always a little 
thing, his hose I used to call it from watching him piss with it. But it 
wasn't so little this time. It wasn't so big, either, I've seen bigger 
things since then. Eddie's is bigger now, too, but I only get to see it now 
when I catch him by surprise in the bathroom. Poor Eddie had to beat off a 
lot until he got his driver's license a few months ago. Now he's always 
taking girl friends to the drive-in, and he doesn't jerk off half as much as 
he used to! 

Sorry, Doctor, I should be getting on with my story. 

Well, when I looked at his thing sticking out all stiff and sore, I figured 
it had puffed up from an infection I'd given him. I hadn't swelled up like 
that, of course, but the way I was bleeding, I figured I had the same 
infection. It just did different things to me, because I was a girl and 
didn't have a thing. 

Since we both had it in the places where we went to the bathroom, we figured 
maybe we'd gotten it from the toilet seat or something. His thing was all 
red and I thought he was going to start bleeding like me, and I felt sorry 
for him. 

I asked him if it hurt much, and he had trouble answering me. I figured it 
must hurt a lot if he couldn't talk, and reached over to play doctor with 
it, thinking maybe it would ease the pain if I did. It only seemed to make 
it worse, though, and I stopped it. 

But when I stopped, he told me not to, that it hurt more when I didn't touch 
it. Then I thought maybe the same would be true for me, too, and told him to 
rub me where I was hurting. 

Well, he gave me this fierce, confused look, and then he started to rub me 
down where it hurt. It made me feel better like I thought it would, but it 
wasn't soothing exactly. 

No, I can't say it was soothing, Doctor. It made me hurt in a different way, 
but a way I didn't mind as much. I kept rubbing him while he rubbed me, and 
felt his thing throb in my hand. 

That made me nervous. I didn't know what to do then. Then I felt my insides 
throbbing, too, and wondered what would happen next. 

Well, he started poking me down there, and I started to moan. That scared 
him, but it didn't stop him. He was too excited to stop! 

Well, I couldn't think straight at this point, and neither could he. His 
eyes opened wide with surprise as he felt the walls of my little pussy 
swallowing his fingers. A little dab of drool fell out of his mouth as he 
watched his fingers slide up a bit into my pussy, and I couldn't take my 
eyes off of it, either. 

It felt so itchy, and I couldn't stand it. I told him how much it tickled, 
and how I couldn't stand it and how he had to help me make it stop. 

Eddie started stratching in there like I had a lot of mosquito bites or 
something, and I started to burn. Eddie was panting like I was, and he said 
I had to help him stop itching somehow, too. 

I figured if his fingers could fit into my pussy, then maybe I could fit his 
stiff little thing into my mouth, and maybe that would help him out, like 
when you suck on a blister, Doctor. 

So I told him to lie down with his feet facing my face and let me try to 
kiss it for him. He tossed around and brought it near my mouth, and I kissed 
it a few times. 

Eddie was weeping, then, and I thought maybe I should do more than just kiss 
it. So I opened up my mouth and let it bob inside. Eddie seemed to like 
that. 

Then Eddie figured, well, if kissing his thing helped him, then maybe he 
should kiss mine. So he put his mouth down on it and started licking my 
wound. 

That felt really good, even though it made me feel a lot hotter. He licked 
and licked, and then he got the tip of his tongue inside and really went to 
work on me. His other end was working hard, too, and it felt funny having 
his balls bouncing against my nose. 

Pretty soon we both were too excited to think about what we were doing! His 
little cock was getting less and less little, and it was throbbing harder 
and harder against the insides of my mouth. I tried not to gag, and tried 
hard not to bite him. Then he really yelled, and I thought maybe I'd bitten 
him after all, but I think I was wrong. But I don't know, it's hard to tell 
what happened, because I started to yell, too! 

I felt some stuff start running out of my legs, it was thicker than the 
blood, and it felt different, too, the way it came out of me. It didn't just 
drip, it came out in heavy spurts. Then Eddie's thing got really big and 
stiff, and some stuff started blowing out of his hose real hard and hot. 

Was I surprised! Eddie, too, I'll bet! A whole mess of this funny, gummy 
stuff started shooting into my mouth in quick spurts, and it tasted really 
strange, kind of pungent like asparagus. 

My mouth was full, and I couldn't just spit it out, so I swallowed it. I 
nearly choked! There was so much happening in my mouth, and it was hard to 
gulp down anything, the way I was having trouble breathing at the time! 

Well, when his dong stopped leaking, I let it go and wiped away the stuff 
from my mouth. It was a gooey gray color, and I looked down at my pussy 
where his mouth still was, and saw some more gooey gray stuff coming out of 
there. We really had the same disease, alright! 

I felt a lot better then, and so did he. We both looked down there, 
wondering, I noticed that he was beginning to hurt again, too! 

Can't talk about what happened next yet, Doctor, I have to stop for a while. 

I didn't push her. Time was about up, anyway. She said she'd come back the 
next day and finish her story then. 

I had a pretty good idea of what was coming next, but I didn't want to say 
anything that would embarrass her, so I just nodded my head when she saw the 
time and asked if she could leave, and saw her to the door. 

INTERVIEW TWO 

According to the plans we'd made the day before, Lee showed up at my office 
after school and sat down across from me. She looked more relaxed than she 
had the last time, and began to talk readily. 

She didn't waste time hemming and hawing, she got down to her story right 
away. 

I let her pick up where she had left off, and sat back silently to hear her 
out. 

Well, Doctor, Eddie stared at the bleeding and said he had an idea. He 
figured he could make it stop if he stuffed up the wound with my panties. He 
thought that maybe that would act like a bandage, and I figured it was worth 
a try. 

So he took my blood-soaked underpants and started to fold them up into a 
bundle. Then he tried to stuff them up my crack, but the material felt 
awfully rough, and it hit against a wall, and I told him to stop it. 

He looked very feverish then, and his member was all bloated again. I 
figured it was softer to the touch than my panties, and figured he'd be able 
to steer it better than a bundle of clothing, and he figured that I was 
probably right. 

Eddie was hardly eleven at the time, and I don't think he'd really gotten in 
to masturbating yet, so I don't think he had much of an idea of how he 
should go about it, or what to expect. 

He said he wondered how far he could put it in without hurting me, and I 
began to wonder about that, too. The pants had hit a wall only a couple 
inches in, but we both figured he'd only be able to get the head in, anyhow. 
After all, we figured, why else would his prick have a cap on it like a 
mushroom unless, just like mushrooms, you were only supposed to use the top 
part? We figured the stem was just there to make it easy to move the cap 
around, sort of like a prow on a boat or something. 

So anyway, Eddie lifted up my dress, and he was too excited to get the tip 
in himself, he kept fumbling and missing the hole, so I stuck my hands down 
there and grabbed it and started to help it in myself. 

It slid in over the cap and hit against the wall. Eddie groaned and sweated 
a lot, and got a real funny look in his eyes. I think I can get in further 
than this if I push, he panted, and I was so worked up by then that I dared 
him to try. 

Well, Eddie really pushed! He couldn't do it, and his cock fell out from the 
strain. 

I was really steaming now, and grabbed at it again. I made it go in again, 
and when the head was safely nestled in my box, I squeezed my thighs 
together to lock it in place. Then I shoved my hands around his buttocks and 
tried to ramrod his ass against me, thinking that would help things out. 
Eddie yowled and said he was afraid he'd hurt me, but we both felt the wall 
begin to sag from the pressure, and he stopped complaining. 

Come on, Eddie, I said, I dared you, and you can't refuse a dare. He grunted 
and pushed some more. 

Well, I felt something ripping, and then I thought maybe I should tell him 
to stop. I whimpered and pleaded with him to end the experiment. I told him 
I took back my dare, but he wasn't listening. 

He pushed harder, and the wall began to really ache. Then it ripped wide 
open, and I screamed. Eddie and I were both astounded at how far the thing 
could go. It sloshed its way all the way up to the root! 

I reached down and grabbed at his balls and squeezed, thinking that would 
make him stop. But it only made him scream and drive harder, and pretty soon 
the pain began to not be just pain anymore, and I stopped trying to make him 
pull out. 

Neither of us knew what to do, we were pretty clumsy about the whole 
business. My pelvis started to wiggle uncontrollably, and I thought I was 
having some sort of fit and got really scared. I only wiggled for a little 
while, though, because my convulsions really got to Eddie, and he popped off 
a couple seconds after they started. 

We sprawled out for a while and didn't know what to make of it. I marveled 
at the way his thing shriveled up and fell out of my box a few seconds after 
it popped, and thought it real strange. Eddie did, too. 

Now I was hurting bad! I had just started to feel something nice and new 
when he popped off, and figured now that that wall had been battered down, 
it wouldn't hurt nearly so much if I got him to try it again. 

I reached over and toyed with his prick to see if I could figure out how to 
make it fatten up again. It shot out and stiffened like magic, and it really 
made me feel like I had some special power over him if I could make that 
happen to him so easily! 

Eddie figured out my idea without my having to explain it, and pretty soon 
he was lying on top of me again, and this time he managed to stick it in all 
by himself. 

Wow! It slid right in so fast, we were both startled by that. We couldn't 
talk, either, we tried to, but we kept having to gulp and catch our breath, 
and it just didn't seem like it was worth the effort. 

Well, his cock started squirming around inside of me, and I pushed up and 
down on his ass because I found out it felt good to have him go in and out, 
in and out. Eddie thought it felt good, too, and started doing the in and 
out stuff by himself. 

He was really spanking my guts, let me tell you, Doctor! And just when I 
thought he'd found the right speed and started to moan with this incredible 
new pleasure, he shifted gears and started to pile-drive hard into me. 

That hurt a lot, at first. But after a few strokes, I shifted gears, too! I 
discovered a whole new bunch of muscles, the ones in my twat, and started to 
squeeze them against his cock. Oh, he liked that, and I liked it, too! Boy, 
did I like that, Doctor! 

So I started squeezing as hard as I could, and he begged me to stop, said it 
really hurt. 

But I couldn't, and he lost control of himself and started to yelp and pound 
his fists against the floor like he was crazy or something. 

I had my hands on his back, and got this spasm that made me squeeze all my 
muscles as hard as I could. I found myself digging my nails into his shirt, 
and gasped at the prickly feel of his buttons digging into my soft little 
tits. 

My nipples started to get hard from the scuffing they were getting. I 
couldn't stand it, now I was getting this incredible rush of pleasure from 
my tits, too! 

I felt really ashamed of myself, the way I started to wheedle and cry, and 
the way Eddie was carrying on, I thought he should be ashamed of himself, 
too! 

Well, maybe I felt ashamed, but actually, I just didn't care at the time. 
The rushes I was getting from so many strange places were really unbearable, 
and all my mind was concentrating on trying to find a way to make them stop. 

But it's not that I didn't like them. I like to laugh like anybody else, and 
tickling always makes me laugh, but too much tickling can drive you crazy, 
if you know what I mean! 

Well, anyway, pretty soon I didn't want it to stop! I shifted gears again, 
not on purpose, it just happened, and my body started doing things I didn't 
know it could, and I sure didn't know how it was doing them, either! 

Eddie, too. He was really screaming, his back was all tense and contorted 
like he was trying to lift an elephant on his back, and he was grinding into 
me like some kind of mindless animal. 

I went totally out of my mind then, I was really swimming, and felt like I 
was going to drown! My head grew so hot, like I had a fever, and I got 
delirious. All my feelings were wrapped around his cock, and I could hardly 
breathe. 

Then I couldn't breathe at all. My throat was rattling, and all my muscles 
squinched together till I thought they'd snap, and then my guts blew up and 
I thought I'd died. 

I blanked out for a few seconds, and when I revived, my head was still 
swimming, and the room was spinning round and round. Then Eddie collapsed on 
me like a wet rag, and I felt a hot gush of that stuff of his spilling all 
over in side of me. That made me blank out again, and a whole lot of my 
stuff gushed out and got mixed in with his. 

It took a few minutes before we could move. His cock was still locked inside 
of me, I couldn't let the muscles of cunt loose yet to let it go free. Then 
he yanked with his hips, and I felt my muscles tighten for an instant and 
then give up. 

When his cock slithered out of my hole, it sent a whole new set of sparks 
flying in me! More of my stuff dribbled out through my crack, and made a 
puddle on the floor. 

We both sat back on our asses and looked at it. It was amazing! We were 
afraid all that stuff shooting out of us was going to be red and bloody, and 
there was some of that, some ripples of blood kind of swished around in the 
puddle, but it was mostly gray stuff, like the stuff I'd wiped off my mouth 
before. 

I'll never forget that sight, Doctor! I've loved the sight of come ever 
since! 

Well, we played with the puddle for a while with our fingers, and I put a 
little dab of it to my lips and realized it was the same stuff I'd swallowed 
before. Quite a revelation! The whole business was beginning to make some 
sort of sense, except for the blood in my pants that had started the whole 
affair. 

We got kind of serious and tried to figure out that part of it. Then Eddie 
said maybe the blood was just some sort of signal from my guts that I was 
supposed to do the things we'd just been doing. 

That was pretty clever of him, I thought, and told him so. Then I threw in 
my two cents and said that mom and dad seemed to do that to each other at 
night, and there was a box of strange white cylinders she kept in the 
bathroom and used for something or other every few weeks, and maybe she used 
them to stuff up her crack when she was bleeding. 

Eddie said that sounded right, because he's seen some of those long, white 
things covered with caked up blood in the garbage when he took it out. 

We were really proud of ourselves then! We were sure we'd stumbled onto some 
big secret, something so big that adults didn't want us kids to know about 
it! We wondered why they didn't let us in on it before, and then Eddie had 
another thought. 

Eddie said he guessed that maybe the adults just wanted to keep all the fun 
for themselves. I thought about that, and then I said that didn't sound like 
it was the whole story. What about that wall that had just been smashed, the 
wall inside my box? That could only happen once, unless it grew back, which 
didn't seem to make much sense. 

Eddie pondered on that for a long time. Then he spoke up again. The way he 
saw it, getting that wall broken was a lot for me the way getting his rod to 
stiffen and pop off was for him. Maybe that's the real difference between 
boys and girls, he suggested, and not just the different ways they had to go 
to the bathroom. 

I told him about my tits, how they had only started to grow a few months 
ago, and then he confided that his cock had only started to get stiff 
sometimes a little while ago, too. 

We began to figure out a lot then. Next thing Eddie says, is how maybe the 
reason our parents hadn't told us about all this yet was because they 
thought we hadn't started all the changes we had to go through to do it yet. 
That made a lot of sense. 

The thing we couldn't figure out was what it was for. But Eddie and I both 
came up with something like an answer at the same time. We'd both seen Zsa 
Zsa, our calico cat, give birth to kittens, and we both knew where the 
kitten came out of. They came out of the place where Eddie had put his cock! 

That was quite a thought! But Eddie had his doubts. Zsa Zsa had her kitten 
weeks after Homer, our male cat, had gotten run over by the milk truck. So 
she couldn't have had that sort of thing happen before the kittens came. 

That was a hard argument to answer. But then I thought I had the way around 
it. People got pregnant for a long time before the babies happened, I said, 
maybe it just took a lot of time for the baby to be made after you put the 
thing in. 

Eddie had an answer to that. If people made a baby every time a man and a 
woman mixed their gray stuff around, then how come they didn't give birth to 
a hundred or a thousand babies at once? That made a lot of sense, because we 
both knew mom and dad were doing that to each other a lot now, now that we 
had figured out what those late night noises meant. 

I think it's only for fun, Eddie said soberly. But neither of us were very 
sure, and all of a sudden we had this funny suspicion that if it was meant 
for more than fun, then maybe we were going to make a baby of our own. That 
was scary, and we wondered how long it would be before we'd know. But it was 
kind of funny, too. I mean, the kid would have to call us Aunt Mommie and 
Uncle Dad! 

We both figured that we should ask our parents about it, but we guessed that 
maybe we shouldn't tell them we had done it to each other, we'd just ask 
some general questions. That's what we did, too. When we asked mommie and 
daddy, and got it all straight, we figured out another thing, too! 

Mommie told me what the bleeding meant, and showed me how to use the napkins 
in the bathroom. She told me about the making babies business, and how the 
bleeding meant the egg was being washed away, so I couldn't make one then. 

Daddy told Eddie about fucking, and later that night, Eddie and I compared 
notes. We thought that since I was still bleeding, and probably would be for 
a few more days, there was no harm in doing this thing that Daddy called 
"fucking" a few more times. We used that tree hut a lot the next few days, 
and never let on to our secret! 

A little while later, Eddie and I started to read about fucking to find out 
more about it, and then Eddie told me one day that it was supposed to be a 
bad thing for brothers and sisters to fuck each other. 

That was really upsetting, and then we started to feel guilty and really 
ashamed. That new word, "incest", really bothered us, and made us feel like 
we'd really done something bad. We did it a couple more times anyway, 
though. But then we figured we ought to stop, and we've hardly fucked each 
other since! 

Eddie started to beat off around then. He beat off a lot, and got upset when 
I found him doing it. He let me give him blow-jobs a few times, though, we 
figured there was no harm in that! But now he's got a car, and does it with 
his girl friends in the drive-in. And I've got a few friends of my own, so I 
guess everything worked out alright. 

It still feels awfully funny when I think back on it, though. 

CONCLUSION 

I was glad to hear that Lee and Eddie were no longer engaging in sexual 
intercourse, and tried to make her fell the gravity of such a practice's 
implications. 

She came back to my office on a few more occasions, and was really amazingly 
frank about her encounters since her involvement with her brother. I tried 
to convince her of the risks involved, and though I got her to change to a 
more certain method of birth control than the use of prophylactics or coitus 
interruptus, I was unable to convince her that she should lessen her sexual 
activity. 

I wanted her to come in for more counselling, and she agreed for a while, 
but I eventually resigned myself to the inevitability of her continued 
waywardness. However, she has calmed down a bit lately, and seems to have a 
steady boy friend. I had to talk her out of dropping out of school, as she 
wanted to go live with him, but she was finally persuaded that it would be 
best to wait until she had gotten her diploma. 

Lee is a very bright and lively girl, and if she manages to get through 
school and avoid pregnancy, I have the feeling she'll make out very well in 
the world. 

! 

CASE HISTORY FOUR 

Subject: Alicia R. 

Age: Twenty 

INTERVIEW ONE 

Alicia R. was one of the most beautiful young women that I have ever 
interviewed. She was a gorgeous, black creature who had been working as a 
high fashion model for a couple of years before the time of our discussions. 

Alicia had small, pert breasts that were perfectly matched by her lithe, 
firmly shaped and delicately carved body. The sensuous sienna luster of her 
flawless skin was a source of constant distraction, I must confess, but she 
obviously was resigned to this sort of thing happening to the men she dealt 
with, and was very suave and supportive. 

She was not at all unwilling to divulge to me the details of her own 
devirginization. Although she hardly entered her third decade, she was 
already a woman of the world, and made it clear to me that she was not one 
to be constrained by inhibitions or taboos. 

All of this was not only charming, but rather surprising: for, as she let me 
know almost immediately, she had only lost her maidenhead a year and a half 
prior to our conversations. But there were many surprises in her, as the 
following transcription of our interviews will reveal. 

I suppose I was a bit slow when it came to sex, Doctor. You see, I got 
involved in modeling when I was about twelve, and as long as I was in 
school, I had no time for men if I was going to make a go of a career, too. 

Not that I wasn't interested, naturally. But the boys in my school were 
rather dull as a rule. My looks made them uncomfortable, I guess, and they 
were all too eager to get at my body. It was rather boring, and not a little 
frustrating, being seen as a sex object instead of as a person, so I kept 
pretty aloof of the goings on in school. 

Around my senior year, though, my modeling really got together, and I began 
to travel a lot and meet some more sophisticated people. But, out of habit, 
I suppose, I still kept my distance. Besides, I didn't want to compromise my 
still new sense of professionalism by mixing business and pleasure. 

At least, that's how I rationalized it to myself. But I found myself getting 
very irritated, what with all the traveling, long stretched of time without 
seeing people I was close to, and so on. And I knew something was missing. I 
still wasn't sure just what it was, but I had enough sense to realize it had 
something to do with the lack of male companionship in my life. 

Oh, there were always plenty of offers. But then another thing began to 
happen: I began to feel attracted to some of the slick and sophisticated 
fellows I kept running into in my work, and I began to feel defensive about 
my innocence. I thought they'd think me some sort of hick or child if they 
found out how little I knew about sex. And how could they help but find out 
if they got me in bed? I wasn't so naive as to think a man could pop my 
cherry and not know it! 

It really got me down. I started getting regular work in Boston, so I 
decided to settle down there for a while and start hunting for a regular man 
in earnest. I didn't have much luck at first, though. I was awfully finicky, 
and was looking for someone who'd be . . . special. 

When you're a virgin for as long as I was, you begin to think you want to 
get a special treat for all your trouble! 

I had a few girl friends from my business, and we all decided to throw a big 
party on Halloween and invite a lot of choice young studs. I figured it was 
now or never, and spent a lot of time on my costume. 

I got dressed up as a belly dancer, a lot of thin gauzy fluff and not much 
substance, you know. I've always been a good dancer, and I knew how to bump 
my bottom! So I was looking forward to a rollicking evening. 

Well, a lot of people came to my party. There were lots of men, but they 
were all so slick and jive. It was just like the scene in high school, only 
they were more pretentious and better dressed. 

Except for one guy. And he wasn't even invited! 

He told me later how he'd managed to crash my party. Seems he was with some 
friends at another party, and one of them was with a girl who was a lab 
technician at a nearby hospital, and she told them there was another party 
going on later at some friend of hers place. Her friend lived across the 
hall from me, and that's how the confusion got started. 

These guys were all students at M.I.T of all places, and I would have 
figured them all for hopeless straights with slide rules slung from their 
hips in leather holsters. But they just didn't fit the stereotype at all! It 
was funny how everybody had gotten into drugs in those days, and it changed 
a lot of people's heads for the better, I think. And besides, a place like 
M.I.T. wants brains, not money and social standing in their students, and 
some of the guys there come from pretty strange backgrounds. 

Anyway, this guy I was talking about, he was going to the other party with 
everyone else, but he was lingering in the car with one of his friends when 
everybody else was going up the stairs, getting stoned. The guy he was with 
had to drive around to find a parking space, so they decided to split 
company and meet upstairs when the joint was done. 

Naturally, he got up to the right floor and forgot the number. My party was 
getting pretty wild, and he figured the party was in my place and walked in. 

Nobody knew who he was, but nobody really cared. He didn't know anyone 
either, of course, but he was pretty bold, and he had his eyes on me from 
the beginning and decided to stay! 

Well, he soon made friends with everyone. He was passing out joints like 
they were chewing gum, and he was really fast and witty, and a real 
character. Not at all slick, either: crude and blunt was more like it. His 
father was a country singer who never made it out of high school, and worked 
days climbing poles for the electric company. And this guy sang and dressed 
like his old man, and really started raising hell. 

Some dumb shit thought he must be a bumpkin and started to rib him, and he 
put the clown down pretty brutally. Everybody caught on that whatever he 
was, weird or not, he was damned smart. And when the jerk jiving him got 
defensive and starting making insulting remarks, he all of a sudden found 
himself flat on the floor with a sore jaw. 

So, anyway, this fellow was making quite an impression, and he kept staring 
at me now and then. But he never tried to force himself on me. I figured he 
was biding his time, waiting for the party to thin out before he jumped me, 
but he wasn't like that. 

He came over to me and said he wanted to dance. I'd watched him cut into the 
ass he'd flattened, and expected he'd feed me some outrageous line, but he 
was surprisingly polite and reserved. I just couldn't figure out his act at 
all. Then I began to figure maybe it wasn't an act, maybe her was just a 
very crazy, but very nice young man. 

He was quite handsome, too, in a rugged, angular sort of way. He moved like 
a real working class type, but his mind kept showing itself to be altogether 
too sharp for that label to fit on him very well. And he could really dance, 
too, even though he was really blasted. Maybe because he was so blasted, 
it's hard to tell! 

He didn't put a hand on me all night. It was driving me mad! The mystery was 
getting to me, and I was getting pretty hot. 

Around one o'clock, he asked me if I wanted to step outside and snort some 
cocaine. Well, he's finally giving me his pitch, I thought, and I decided to 
see how much of an act he'd been putting over on me and go out with him. I 
was sure he was going to start pawing me all over once he got me alone! 

Well, wrong again! Not that he didn't touch me. Hardly that! But he was very 
gentle, and didn't force me into anything. He just kept talking at a mile a 
minute, and not some song and dance about his ego trip, either, he was 
cracking jokes and asking about me and what I did, and after a few minutes I 
realized he hadn't said more than two words about himself. 

He took out a silver spoon and started ladling wads of coke into his 
nostrils, and into mine, too. I hadn't been into much drugs, and I got quite 
a wild body high. And he kept cracking me up with his insane lines, and 
still hadn't groped for my tits or anything! 

I asked him what he did, and he suddenly grew quiet. When he told me about 
going to M.I.T. and doing all this heavy mathematical stuff, I thought he 
was feeding me a line of shit. But he had a school ring that proved his 
case, and now I was really confused as hell. 

I asked him about where he came from, and when he started telling me about 
his lunch pail and hard hat upbringing, and getting drunk with the old man 
in country western dives and all, I started to make some sense out of him. 
He was a rowdy romantic or something, who by some freak accident had gotten 
stuck with an excellent mind. No wonder he was so damned crazy! 

We started to snort some more coke, and I began to think he was for real. 
And I began to think that he was really good with women, too, he hadn't 
grown up in some ivory tower world, he had to bust his ass to escape to one! 
I was really hot to get him to let me see that bestial side of him, I began 
to want him. 

But I didn't know what to do, and I was getting very stoned. Then he put his 
arms around me to keep me on my feet, I was that stoned, you see, and though 
he started kissing me and getting very excited, he had a lot of control and 
respect for me, and I just wasn't used to that at all! 

I wanted him to do something, and I wanted him to know it, but I didn't want 
him to think I was cheap, so I couldn't figure out what to do next. He did, 
though. He read me loud and clear, and walked me over to his friend's car 
and got me into the back seat. 

Well, I was feeling kind of self-conscious, I had next to nothing on, my 
costume being what it was! He made no bones about letting me know he liked 
that, either. He lit up another joint, and dropped his head into my lap and 
crossed his legs. He had a massive bulge in his pants that became very 
visible when he slung his leg up, and he knew it, and he knew I could see 
it, and he didn't give a shit! 

Excuse my language, Doctor, but I don't know how else to put it. Here he 
was, obviously very hot for me, but he had such control, and he was so 
confident of himself, too, that was very obvious. But he still didn't try to 
do anything, it was really too much. He was enjoying taking his time, he 
wanted me to relax and enjoy it, too! 

Maybe he feels funny that I'm black, I thought, but that didn't make much 
sense. He was being very natural with me, and he was really paying attention 
to me, not just my body or some myth about wild black bitches, nothing like 
that at all. 

When he saw I was getting too high to function, he took the joint from me 
and finished it himself. He had a lot of capacity in a lot of things, 
because he was still damned coherent, even if he was kind of crazy! Well, he 
all of a sudden stared up at me and put two strong hands on my shoulders and 
spoke one word: "Com'ere!" he said, and pulled me down. 

I laughed and got a fit of the giggles. He smiled and kept his eyes fixed on 
mine, didn't even blink, and pulled me down on him and gave me a really 
long, deep tongue kiss. 

I was startled. I gasped, and found myself burning with wild heat all of a 
sudden, and then he wraps his hands around my neck and stares at me some 
more, and this time he says not one word, but three: "I like you" he said, 
so blunt and matter-of-fact that I was stunned. 

I didn't know what I was supposed to say. So he likes me, I thought to 
myself, how about that? Then he says, still staring at me and taking in my 
every gesture, a whole sentence: "If you can't talk, kiss me again." Just 
like that! And with a bit of country twang, yet! 

Well, I kissed him! Let me tell you, rockets went off! Then he very 
naturally slid his left hand up on my tits, and started rubbing. He was 
still staring at me, but his expression had changed. His face got very soft, 
but his eyes were on fire. I gulped, and rubbed my hand nervously on his 
bulge. He liked that, and gave me a contented smile. 

It was driving me wild! I was moaning, and he took my cue and started 
undoing the straps on the skimpy bra I had on. That was the first time a man 
had gotten even that far with me, and I was numb with suspense and bubbling 
over with passion. He told me to lift up my arms so he could slide the 
straps down my arms, and that made me feel awfully stupid. 

Well, now I'm nude from the waist up, and as he starts sucking my tits, I 
started heaving up and down, jostling him in my lap. I bumped his jaw by 
accident, and felt his teeth sink into my nipple. I squealed, and then he 
rolled off me and pushed me down along the back seat and clambered on top of 
me. 

I was loosing control rapidly, and I groped around for his luscious big cock 
as he started to hump me, and when I got a hold of that bulge, I realized 
that I didn't know what to do with it. 

He understood my distress all too completely. He came to a stop, just as his 
fingers were edging their way into my groin, and he gave me that deep, 
mind-blowing stare of his and came out with another of his blunt little 
sentences. "You've never made love with 

. a man, have you?", he said. 

I couldn't meet his stare, and started crying and moaning and then I looked 
up at him for a half second or so and just blurted it out: "No!", I whined, 
and hugged him. I felt humiliated! I was sure he was going to throw me out 
of the car or laugh at me or start ripping off what little clothes I had on 
to get at my precious little cherry, but he didn't do any of those things. 
Instead, he just chucked my chin and cried a little himself, and gave me one 
of those damned blunt sentences of his: "I'm sorry" he sighs, and then he 
slowly moves off of me and sits me up straight and then seats himself next 
to me and stares. 

Then he gives me this really pained look, a really sad look, and all of a 
sudden he's collected and cool again, and then he plays with my hair and 
gives me this oh so gentle kiss and smiles tenderly. 

"Think about it," he says, and then he nibbles my ear and gives me this 
burning kiss and says, "Let's go back to your party!". 

God, I was so hot I ached all over, and I knew he did, too, but he wouldn't 
let himself show it, he just got out of the car and then walked over to my 
side of the car and, with this very self-consciously exaggerated gallantry, 
he opens the door and waves me out. We both laughed and then he wrapped his 
arms around me in a bear hug and gives this really lusty, crude slobbering 
and biting kind of kiss that made me melt. I knew I'd really fallen for him 
then! 

Alicia was lost in a pleasant reverie, and stopped talking. I noticed that 
our time was about up, so I told her, and she jumped with a start and 
blinked. She smiled and apologized, and then we set a time for our next 
meeting. 

I was looking forward to hearing the rest of her story, and told her so. She 
blushed, and told me she was looking forward to it, too. Then she got out of 
her seat and pranced to the door. I couldn't help watching her lovely body 
as it moved before me so gracefully, and almost felt jealous of that wild 
young man she was telling me about. I couldn't believe that the last part of 
her story would be so innocent as the first part. As it turned out, I was 
correct in my assessment. 

INTERVIEW TWO 

Alicia arrived promptly and began the rest of her story without delay. She 
was very relaxed throughout her monologue, and seemed to delight in 
revealing all the little details of her first sexual encounter. 

She had apparently enjoyed it immensely, experiencing multiple orgasms the 
first time she went to bed with her man. I thought that highly unusual, and 
inquired as to whether she shared my sentiment. But she told me he was a 
very unusual man, and so that was only to be expected. 

I laughed at her coy humor, and began to feel jealous of that lucky man 
again. Then she changed her tone, and got on with her narrative. 

When we got upstairs, a bunch of his friends were milling around in the 
hall. They'd just come out of the other party, and were ogling me and giving 
knowing looks to their friend. I was really offended at first, but he 
handled it so well that my sense of offense changed to one of feeling 
flattered. He let them know he felt pretty good about himself, but he 
refused to gloat. I wanted to cry for that kindness! 

He saw me to my door and looked very ill at ease for the first time that 
evening. He said he felt obliged to return home with his buddies, but that 
he really wanted to see me again, and soon! 

He asked me for my phone number, and the way I was dressed, I certainly 
couldn't pull out a pen and paper to write it down for him. But he said he 
had a good memory for numbers, and made a little game out of mine and made 
up some ridiculous formula to make all the digits fit together in a pattern. 
That made me laugh. He was a sly one, but very sweet! I didn't want him to 
leave, and he knew it, but he also knew that circumstances made it the 
better part of valor to wait. 

He told his friends he'd meet them downstairs, and when they had disappeared 
into the elevator, he squeezed against me and humped me up and down against 
the door. God, I wanted it then! 

I reached down and felt for his cock. It was so swollen, and I couldn't 
leave him like that, so I reached into his pants and hugged it. 

He slid his pants under the tiny pants of my costume and started fingering 
my pussy. Oh! I'd never felt anything like that before! I didn't want it to 
ever end, I just rolled with his deft, tender strokes and felt my come 
dribbling into my poor little pants! 

He was awfully hot himself, and I was astonished at how his thing got 
stiffer and more angry and began to throb heavily in my hand. I could feel 
his cock rear back and get ready to fire, and then his come burst out in a 
torrent, all over his underpants and my twitching hand. 

That was a first for me, let me tell you! I was so bashful about it, I was 
afraid to pull my hand out of his pants for fear of messing up his jeans 
with all that sticky stuff welling in the spaces between my fingers and 
under my nails! 

But I pulled it out anyhow, and he obviously couldn't care less what kind of 
a mess I made! He was too busy panting, and trying to bring me off. That he 
did soon enough! 

My legs were wobbling, and if it weren't for the weight of his big, strong 
body pushing me tightly against the wall, I would have crumpled to the floor 
in nothing flat! 

Having never come before I'd never even masturbated, believe it or not! I 
had no idea of what to expect, and started making wild, bestial noises that 
I couldn't believe were really coming from me! 

Well, I couldn't take much more of this, I was so damned nervous about 
people hearing us and coming out into the hall and seeing. So I pushed his 
hand away with much regret, and gasped confusedly and hugged him. 

My dripping hand made an awful mess on his jacket, and he laughed giddily 
when he caught on. I was so ashamed of myself for being so awkward, and 
having so little control of myself, but he just beamed at me and made me 
feel so, so good about it! 

I wanted to say something to him, anything at all to tell him how he'd made 
me feel, and I just couldn't. He was awfully understanding and just kissed 
me and said he'd call me real soon. 

I wanted him so badly! That nervous, awkward taste of pleasure made me 
unbearably hungry for more, and I started to blither and whine, and I wanted 
to say I wanted him to make it with me as soon as we saw each other again. 
But I only got the sentence started when he put his finger to my lips and 
told me to hush. 

I wanted to melt! He thought if he let me say it and he knew damned well 
what I wanted to say then! he thought that would be taking advantage of me 
somehow, and he wouldn't let me. I understood so much about him then. I 
wanted to drag him into my bed right then and understand him like crazy, but 
I knew that wouldn't be right somehow, that it would wreck the beautiful 
mood, waiting for him to call, working myself into a frenzy with the thought 
that he'd been too stoned to remember my number! 

Well, he called me, finally, at exactly six o'clock. I was so excited, I 
couldn't get out more than three words in a row without stuttering. But he 
was so calm, just oozing his sexy, controlled warmth, and we made a date for 
later that evening. 

He didn't show till nine. Those three hours between his call and the ringing 
of my bell were sheer agony. When I heard him ring me, I literally lunged at 
the intercom to let him in. The next two minutes waiting for the elevator to 
arrive were worse than the whole three hours that went before! 

When he came in the door that I'd had open ever since he'd buzzed the 
intercom, he presented me with a bouquet of gorgeous black orchids. It was 
too much! It would have seemed so hokey from anyone else but him, and I just 
started to cry and cry. 

He put his arms around me and asked me what was wrong. At last, he didn't 
understand something! It felt so good to know I could find a vulnerable spot 
in him, and I just squeezed him and slobbered all over his face and told 
them the flowers were beautiful. 

I basked in the look of confused hurt on his face and wanted to eat him up. 
Then all of a sudden I felt so bashful, and I blushed and got silly as a 
goose. 

That made him laugh, and he pinched my bottom and sat down on the couch. I 
went to put the orchids in some water, and couldn't find a vase. I felt so 
helpless! But he came to the rescue and plopped them in a long, thin beer 
glass he found in one of the cabinets in the kitchen. 

I thought that was hilarious, and couldn't stop laughing at him. He was in 
control of himself again, and laughed back. We both stood there, me against 
the sink, him with his arms folded and his muscular ass tight against the 
stove, laughing like lunatics. 

He pulled out two tickets to a concert he'd told me he wanted to take me to. 
That was something else, he really thought I wanted to wait! It was an 
expensive concert, too, he'd put some thought into it, and must have sifted 
through all the small talk we'd traded the night before to find just the 
right thing to please me! 

It was a lovely idea, and I was touched by his consideration, but I'll be 
damned if I was going to wait any longer! I had some lovely ideas of my own, 
and I was getting worked up trying to think of a way to drag him to bed and 
passing up the concert without seeming too horny or insulting. 

I said I didn't know what I should wear, and began to fret and skitter about 
the apartment like a wet hen. I asked him to help me look for some things so 
he wouldn't just stand there patiently waiting for me. That would have 
spoiled everything! I dragged him by the hand from one closet to another 
being a model, I needed lots of closet space! and then I said I'd figured 
out what I was going to put on, it was in the bedroom, and he'd have to help 
me get into it, it was very tight with a lot of buckles and zippers and 
everything. 

He'd been very confused by all this, but when I got him into the bedroom and 
closed the door behind me and stared at him frantically while my fingers 
wiggled the knob, I think he began to get the picture! 

I didn't want to be too coarse about it, I'd been fantasizing about this 
moment all day long, and so I pretended to still be interested in putting on 
those ghastly clothes I'd been telling him about and asked him to take them 
out of the closet. 

Well, he went fumbling through the closet, and got all wrapped up in that I 
had so many clothes in there, that gave me a lot of time, thank God! and 
while he was busy with that, I quickly slithered out of the things I was 
wearing until I was down to just my panties and my bra. 

They weren't just any underclothes, though, I'd planned it out before! It 
was the belly dancer uniform I'd worn the night before, but without all the 
fluffs of gauze! Bare essentials was more than enough already! 

My timing was perfect! I held the hem of my skirt at my knees until I heard 
him turn around, and then I dropped it casually to the floor, as if I'd just 
happened to finish getting out of my things when he turned around to look at 
me! 

He asked me if he had the right thing, and I didn't even bother to look, I 
just told him to bring it over! 

I had my back to him, and he handed it to me over my shoulder and I put my 
left foot up and tried to insert it into the top of the unzipped gown. I 
made a point of being clumsy, and squealed as I fell back against him and 
rebounded onto the bed. Then I stretched out flat and pouted, and asked him 
to help me up-Well, he bent down over me and clasped my shoulders, and I 
shivered and sunk into the mattress. He thought I was just teasing, and 
tried to coax me into being more pliant. I wanted to be a lot more pliant 
than he knew, though, and I told him I'd hurt my ankles and he'd have to 
lift me. 

He knew what a line of shit that was! Help you, my ass, he said, and fell 
down on the bed and sprawled across me. 

Ouch, I stubbed my toe, he mocked, and sniffed my ass. Those panties reeked 
from the night before, let me tell you! And he was kind enough to tell me so 
in no uncertain terms, and started to pull them down my legs. 

He alternately laughed and panted as I squealed in protest, but the way I 
was squirming left no doubt in either of our minds that my protests were 
just a lot of shit. He was at my bra, and I quickly raised my arms above my 
head so he could slip it off as fast as possible! 

Well, I figured there was no point in pretending any more! I spun around 
onto my backside and starting wrenching maniacally at his clothes. God, was 
he hot! God, was I! Those few minutes of ripping at each other's clothes 
took forever. Finally, we were both naked. At last, I had a chance to look 
at that marvellous cock of his! 

I sat there with my legs wide open, just looking at that monstrous thing, 
and drooled like a goddam infant! Finally, I got up the nerve to touch it! 
It dripped a few drops of lubricant on my finger and jumped up inches! 

He began to fondle my pussy, but I would have none of it! I was so hot and 
steamy already that I couldn't bear to waste any more time. I made some 
shockingly indelicate noises and yanked his cock toward my box and stuck it 
in. He obligingly fell on top of me with a ferocious grunt, and from there 
on in, I let him run the show! 

It was a much better show than any concert could possibly have been! I 
decided to jettison all my damned controls and just let myself go! When his 
cock slid slowly in and came up against my cherry, I whined and whimpered 
and beat him with my fists. I wanted more! 

He was blunt in bed as well as in speech, and he just gnashed his teeth and 
rammed. Shit! Did that hurt! But not for long! I was so glad that useless 
piece of flesh was finally gone for good, and wasted no time mourning its 
demise. I was starving for that bloated cock! I squeezed and twisted and 
bleated like a sheep, and knocked the wind out of myself with excitement 
when I felt it finally stab all the way in! 

I didn't know what to do with my hands, they were flopping all over him like 
a flag in a gale, and it was just too much effort to keep my mind on them 
and on my gorged little pussy all at the same time! 

He was so good! He nearly came about five times, driving me out of my mind 
with anticipation of feeling his sperm drench my box, and dread of having it 
be over so soon! But he somehow managed to keep from popping off for half an 
hour, and I was wiggling and wailing and wallowing in my heat like a horny 
pig in a puddle! But I was rather untutored, and after half an hour of mad 
grinding, I was sore as hell and couldn't take it any more. My fagged out 
pussy had had enough, poor thing! 

Well, I gritted my teeth and determined to have one last blinding orgasm 
before I threw in the towel and crapped out for good. He knew where I was 
at, the dear, and he drove me to an incredible peak and drowned me in a lake 
of raging come just when I was bursting from the unbearable release of my 
own! 

Well, that really did me in! I just lay there for what must have been 
another half hour, hardly able to breathe, while he crawled all over me 
nibbling every bump and hollow he could find! Such delicious torture! 
Mmmmmm! The thought of it makes my flesh crawl even now! 

His precious tickets were dangling limply from his pants pockets crumpling 
on the floor, and he picked them up woozily and started mumbling something 
about there still being time to make it, but I hushed his mouth with a sharp 
wrench at his balls, and then I snatched those tickets and tore them into 
shreds! 

Oh! he appreciated that, and his rod grew mean again and I pulled back from 
it in fright But then I figured, what the hell, a little pain and soreness 
never killed anybody, and even if it did, it was a nice way to go! 

Well, he mounted me again, and this time he felt enormous, but I didn't 
care, I swallowed it greedily and began rocking. Well, he didn't shilly 
shally this time, he popped out lickety-split and filled me up with gobs of 
his sticky hot stuff. Oh, did that feel funky! I was so "pleased with 
myself, I hugged and scratched him forever, and wiggled my black bottom 
until I drained him of every last drop! 

It was such a wonderful night! I didn't let him go till late afternoon on 
the following day, and by then we were both so spent we couldn't even get up 
to go to the bathroom! Our bodies stank deliciously, and I hated the thought 
of losing all those yummy smells in the shower. But I had to eventually, of 
course, and he finally dragged me into the bathroom and threw me under the 
water with him and socked it to me again while the water drizzled down into 
my crack and burned. 

Well, what more can I Bay? I saw him a lot after that. I still do! He's just 
too good to let him get away! We do a lot of other things together now, of 
course, I don't want to give you the wrong impression, Doctor, but God! we 
still do a lot of that other thing, too! 

CONCLUSION 

I can't think of anything to add to Alicia's own vivid account, so I'll 
forego making any elaborate conclusions. When she got up to leave, she 
looked nervously at her watch, and I got up to open the door for her. 

When the door swung open, she beamed as she saw the large, hulking man who 
was standing patiently outside waiting for her. There was little question in 
my mind about who he was, and I felt an uncharacteristic surge of 
embarrassment overcoming me as I averted my eyes from his grinning face. 

I soon got control of myself, however, and wished the happy couple a fond 
good evening. She never did tell me his name. 

CASE HISTORY FIVE 

SUBJECT: Josie F. AGE: Fifteen 

INTERVIEW ONE 

The girl who came into my office was pretty in the way that cheer leaders 
are. Blonde, Ail-American look, with blue eyes, a charming shape, and a 
lovely face. Although she was only fifteen, she had a sizeable bust, and she 
wore jeans that tightly followed the seductive lines of her figure. 

As you may know, Doctor, I am a cheer leader at Newton High, even though I 
am a freshman. I am out there, in front of the school with the other girls, 
trying to get the stands do their bit to support the school. 

Well, after the game with Wheatley High, we went over to Brown's, the local 
pub, and because I was with the older students, they did sneak me a couple 
of gin and tonics. It was a happy time, being with the girls and the guys. 

One time that I looked around to see who was there, I noticed this man at 
the bar, about forty, with dark eyes and a strong face. Just as my eye 
picked him up, he turned away, as if he had been staring at me, and seemed 
guilty. 

I was in such a great mood that I didn't really care who was looking at me, 
in fact, I was floating with the drinks. I thought, naturally, he would look 
at a pretty girl. 

You see, doctor, I had just blossomed out this year. My figure started to 
develop and my bust, and the boys were beginning to notice me. Until this 
year, however, I was just a kid that the boys went right by! 

Now, they all were looking, and I. felt popular and attractive, even though 
I had not done any real dating. I was comparatively innocent in the whole 
area of sex. 

Anyway, afterward, we all went out, and dropped off the various kids on the 
way home. I finally ended up with Margarite, whose home is four blocks 
before mine. 

So, there were these four blocks to walk through to get to my house. It was 
dark at the time, of course, and just about here, the houses thin out, and 
there is one street of an empty lot. 

I was walking along, my head dancing with the excitement of the day, so that 
I didn't even notice the car. It stopped alongside me, or just in front. And 
I kept walking. 

Then a voice from the car called out for directions to Edwards Street. 

I came to the edge, to tell them where it was. 

The door opened, and it was this man. 

He had a knife in his hand. "Get in, if you don't want to get hurt," he 
said. His voice was really ugly. I felt that he would hurt me if I didn't. 
There was nobody around, we were on a dark street. I thought I might run for 
it, but there was something about him that made me cancel that idea. 

He grabbed my arm, and hissed at me. "I'm not going to hurt you. Just don't 
anything crazy. Get it." 

So, I got in. 

He moved the car nice and easy up the street, and I was hoping that someone 
had seen us from the window. But my hopes for it were low. 

My heart was beating, and I was frightened to death. 

I recognized this man, as the one at the bar, who had been watching me, and 
now I realized why he had. Oh, doctor, you have no idea how frightened I 
was! 

"Take it easy, kid," he said. "Nobody's gonna hurt you. Just don't panic. 
Don't try anything funny." 

And he drove just past my house, so that I could see the lights in the 
window, even see my mother walking past the window. It really tore me up. 

I wondered what would happen. He didn't look crazy. He just looked like 
someone who wanted what he wanted, and was willing to take a crazy chance to 
get it. 

He drove out of town, out toward the Trent Woodlands, and got into a 
secluded place out there. 

All this time, he had the radio on, so I could hear rock music, the kind I 
loved, and news of our win over Wheatley High. 

It all seemed so normal, that it was hard to think that I could be in any 
danger. 

"Listen," he said, after we slowed down. "Now, don't get excited or 
anything. We're just gonna have a good time. You won't get hurt, unless you 
behave bad. If you screech or make a terrible fuss, it's just you that's 
gonna get hurt. Not me." 

Then he reached into his glove compartment and brought out a bottle of 
scotch. 

"Here, kid. Have a drink. It'll make things easier." 

"What are you going to do, mister? You're not gonna hurt me." 

"Take a drink and relax. You're gonna have a good time. That's all." 

"Look, mister. I'm just a kid. I'm only fifteen. I don't know anything about 
having a good time. I'm just too young for fooling around." 

He grinned at me. "No. Kid, you're just the right age for fooling around. 
You didn't know that, did you?" 

"Please, mister. Let me go. I won't tell a soul. Nobody will know. Please." 

"Don't beg, kid. A sharp looking chick like you shouldn't beg for anything. 
It's time you learned all about the real world, anyway. You're the right 
age." He gave me some. 

I was too frozen to drink it. 

He lifted my hand, helped me drink some. 

Then he stared at me, his eyes greedy. "You're some sharp looker, kid. I 
admired you at the game. And I admired you at the bar. You're too good to 
waste on those wet-assed kids. I'm gonna teach you how to appreciate a good 
man. So that, when you get involved you'll be able to handle yourself 
better." 

And he put my hand over his crotch. 

I had not, until then, realized it, but somehow, he had got his cock out, so 
that it was there in the flesh, naked! 

It was such a shock to me, that I pulled away, as if I had touched a hot 
stove. 

He laughed. "You never touched a hot cock before. I can tell. Here, come 
back. Learn about what a real cock is like!" 

And he got my hand and brought it back to his cock! 

I was in shock, but at the same time, amazed at the size of the thing. I 
have a young brother, Freddie, four years younger. When he was a kid, I saw 
his thing, and it was a tiny piece of flesh. It never occurred to me that 
the thing could grow to this enormous hunk of meat. It was tremendous. 
Thick, fat, muscular, and hot, with veins on it. 

It almost hypnotized me, and I felt a sharp excitement, for he forced me to 
hold it. The silky feel of it, the thick head of it. I had to look at it, 
however shook up I was. 

"Nothing like it around," he grinned. He seemed to have pride. 

"What do you mean?" I stumbled. 

"Ever seen a prick like this?" 

"I've never seen one ever! Oh, mister, please let me go. I'm too young for 
you. You need a grown woman." 

"Don't tell me what I need. I need young chicks like you. You're the only 
kind. I know you're a virgin. One look at your face told me you were a 
virgin! I can read it like a book." 

"But why should you want a young kid, if you can get older women?" 

"Because young kids turn me on!" 

"Look, you'll be glad you met me, after we're through," he gloated. 

And he pulled on my shirt, unbuttoned it, and got my breasts out. 

"Now, keep your hand on my cock, kid. Don't take it away." 

The funny thing, doctor, is that I didn't .want to take it away. It had 
become the most fascinating thing I ever held in my life. I was frightened, 
all right, but I surely was fascinated, too." 

And he bent down and started to kiss my boobs. He put his mouth over my tit 
and began to suck on the nipple. I could smell the booze on his breath, 
smell his sweat. I could see his thick neck. His hands were so strong, that 
I thought he had to be in some physical work. 

He was a powerful man, and I could not, in any way, resist him, if he wanted 
to rape me. 

And, it was foolish for me to imagine that he would not want to rape me. I 
figured it out. That he didn't care for older women. That he wanted only 
young girls. Perhaps, he could only respond sexually to young girls. 

I understood there were men like that. It was horrible to be at the mercy of 
a man like him, but it would be stupid, I figured, to do crazy things. Like 
to fight for my virginity. 

I figured that ultimately, my virginity would go. So it happened a little 
earlier than later. 

My main hope was that he wouldn't hurt me. And there was nothing in his 
attitude that seemed to be, well, criminal. 

My mind was working a mile a minute, even though we were sitting there, and 
he was sucking my breast. 

He went to the other breast, and sucked that. And, I couldn't help feel 
turned on. He was making me excited, in spite of myself. I kept holding onto 
his huge cock, and he was sucking my tits. 

It all turned me on. I could feel my own groin wet. I felt a real wetness 
between my thighs. 

I thought to myself. This man, this stranger, is going to fuck me. I thought 
that it would be one of the boys at school, Bobby, who I really admired. A 
terrific tennis player, an athlete, a beautiful guy. I thought that he would 
be the guy that ultimately I would give my cherry to. 

But, suddenly, like a bolt from the blue, this stranger comes, and I find 
myself in his car in the woods, holding his cock. Feeling his licking my 
nipples, and sending a shaft of excitement through me. 

I wondered what was ahead now. 

I just didn't want to be hurt. But was there any way of. avoiding the hurt. 
He would not be satisfied, I felt, unless he got to my cherry. He was what 
the men called a cherry buster! 

INTERVIEW TWO 

"What's your name." 

"Josie." 

"My name is Frank." 

We looked at each other. I was holding his cock, he was holding my tit. 

He laughed. "Okay, Josie. Get all your clothes off. We gotta make better 
contact." 

"No." 

He gave me the gimlet stare. And there seemed to be danger in it. "Don't 
hurt me." 

I started to get my jeans off, then my panties. 

He stared at my body, all nude, beside him. "Slip onto the back seat. I'll 
be there." And he, too, began to get his clothes off. 

He watched me climb over, staring at my ass. 

"Honey, you've got a gorgeous ass. I might just want to kiss that sweet ass 
of yours." 

His body was hairy, lots of hair on his chest. He was muscular, 
well-developed, a strong body. When he climbed over, I could now see his 
cock and balls, the hair over his cock. 

He put his arms around me. And he crooned. 

"Oh, you are one sweet bitch!" 

There was an excitement in this stranger holding me like that. I had to 
confess it. I was frightened of his intentions, but his body did a lot of 
things to my head. 

I watched him. 

He laid me out alongside of the seat, and got his face up against my crotch. 
I had no idea what he was going to do. I thought he wanted to stare at my 
cunt, to see what it was like. 

Instead, he kissed it! 

I had never had anyone do that to me. 

Then he spread my cuntlips and put his tongue into my pussy and started to 
lick around. It seemed incredible that anyone would do such a thing! 

I almost jumped up, from the shock of it, but he had me nailed down. He 
wouldn't let me loose, not in a million, for what he was doing seemed to 
give him tremendous excitement! 

"Oh, you honey-pot. You sweet young honey-pot," he moaned, in between 
sucking my pussy. 

He seemed to know where to put his tongue, for it make my vagina really 
vibrate. I enjoyed the touch of his tongue, the hard way it went in and out. 
As if it were a male cock, rather than a tongue. 

I felt a powerful impulse to push his head into my crotch, because of the 
funny tense feelings that were going on. 

Suddenly, I felt this tremendous gush of feelings, the orgasm, and I went 
off in a cloudburst! It was fabulous, the way that I felt. Like a great 
spasm of the pleasure nerves in my pussy! 

I grabbed his head and pushed him into my cunt, and found myself heaving up 
my thighs against his face! It just was unbearably beautiful. 

And this stranger, called Frank, had done it to me. 

I almost felt glad that he had grabbed me off the street, to give me this 
excitement. 

But this was just the beginning for him. 

"You liked that, didn't you, Josie?" He was grinning, and his lips were wet, 
obviously, from my cunt-juice. He wiped his mouth. 

I couldn't tell him that I liked it. Though my actions told him plenty, I 
suppose. After all, you don't tell a rapist you are enjoying the rape, do 
you, doctor?" 

But he now grabbed my face, and kissed me. I was shocked, because he had 
just been licking my pussy. I could practically taste my own cunt-juice on 
his lips! 

Still, it was even exciting, him kissing me. I was turned on by this guy who 
came out of left field,and was doing all these wild things to me. He made me 
discover my body! That was what was really happening. 

Then, to my shock, he pushed my head down toward his cock. 

"Now. It's your turn, Josie, to do that to me. Suck my cock." 

"What?" 

I was stunned that should want me to do such a thing to him. Yet, he had, in 
a way, done that to me. But i found myself completely at his mercy. I would 
have to do what he wanted. Yet, I confess, doctor, that it was an 
interesting problem. 

I approached his prick, for he had my head forced down, my mouth just over 
it. 

I stared at the size of it! A spectacular size. What a huge cock! I wondered 
if I could get my mouth around it, it seemed that big. 

He pushed my head closer. 

"Kiss it first. Gentle kisses, you little bitch." 

I kissed his cock. The head of it. It was so silky, soft, yet hot." 

"Now, lick it, along the shaft. Go up and down." 

I did that, too. I was amazed at the silkiness of his cock. 

Then, he told me to open my mouth and take the cock in. "Take it in your 
mouth, sweet bitch!" 

It was the moment that I dreaded. Yet, it was also a moment that I craved 
for. I'll be absolutely honest, doctor. I opened my mouth and took in his 
cock. 

The heat of hs cock was something amazing. 

I let it just rest there, in my mouth. 

"Now, get your tongue working under it. Then pulled your mouth up and down 
on the head of it. Do that, kid!" 

So, I did that, too. I let my tongue work under it. And it seemed to do 
crazy things to him. He began to moan, and to mutter under his breath. 

I could tell that what I was doing was knocking him out. He leaned back, as 
if too weak to do anything to respond to the sensations that he was getting 
from my mouth. 

He could be my victim, now, if I wanted to suddenly destroy him, I thought. 
He was prostrate, out, just leaning back. 

I could taste the leakage of his juices, the tart taste of it. It did not 
displease me. I found it exciting that I could do such tremendous thing to 
him. Weaken him, make him moan like that. 

I began to get into the excitement of it. Of sucking on it. I found that the 
longer it stayed in my mouth, the more intense the excitement. 

I was totally turned on by what I was doing. It seemed quite impossible that 
I was the innocent little cheer leader, who didn't know what for about sex. 
That I would now be sucking the cock of a strange man who suddenly appeared 
in my life! 

How unpredictable is life, doctor! 

That's partly the idea that streaked into my head when I was sucking his 
cock. But then, he spoke to me. 

"Now, my balls. Lick them, too. Gently. Put them in your mouth, run your 
tongue over them. 

So I went all the way down to his balls, and tried to do what he said. That 
was a different experience, somehow. But I was all into it now, and it no 
longer mattered what I did. I was so high on the sex thing, that I was ready 
to do anything he asked. 

And, of course, he asked it. 

"Now, stick your tongue up my ass, and wiggle it there. 

And to my amazement, I went ahead and did it, just like that. Nothing seemed 
beyond me, at this moment. 

"Now, go back to my cock and suck it till I come." 

I did as he directed me. I was a zombie, ready to cooperate with my 
destroyer. 

I went back to his cock, and it seemed that I had got greater skill, more 
technique than ever. Because I could suck his cock marvelously now. 

I went at it as if it were the tastiest piece of meat in the world. I bit it 
lightly, and licked it, worked my tongue under it. I was really carried away 
by the sucking and by the powerful response that it had in him. 

I could then feel him swelling up. 

And his voice, very agitated said, "When I come, keep your mouth over my 
cock. Don't let go, do you hear. Hold it. Swallow it. Swallow the juice." 

And then it hit me. His cock spilled its seed, a whole gush of cream right 
into my mouth. If he had not warned me, I would have gagged to death, it was 
so sudden and strange. 

But I was swallowing part of it, and letting some of it get away, for it was 
just too much. I would surely have strangled. 

He held my head so that I couldn't totally release his cock. 

And then, he slumped back, leaving his cock in my mouth. 

We stayed like that, until I felt his thing starting to lose its rigidity. 
Start to get soft and limp. 

Then, I pulled away, and got some tissues to wipe my face. 

"That's good for your skin," he said. "It's pure protein. Helps your 
beauty." 

I said nothing, just wiped the juice from my lips. 

I wondered now, what would happen. Whether it was all over. 

It hadn't been all that terrible. If only he didn't hurt me, then it 
wouldn't be such a terrifying experience. 

"Can we go now?" 

He smiled. "What's the hurry, kid? You're enjoying yourself. You know it." 

I had been, but why tell him that! 

It had been a tremendously exciting scene for me. My first sex scene, and 
with this virile, older man. 

"Why can't we go?" 

"Why? Why do you suppose?" 

"I don't know. You look tired. You look finished." 

"Oh. Yeah. Well, don't count me out that fast, kid. We haven't fucked yet!" 

Fucked! Then he would want to fuck after all. That's what really frightened 
me. That's how he might hurt. 

I tried to imagine what it would be like when that thick heavy cock of his 
tried to get into my virginal cunt. The idea was terrifying. 

"Please let me go. I've give you enough." 

"Now, now, kid. You know that it's been fun for you too. We'll have one good 
fuck. Then I may let you go." 

I felt despair. I would still have to undergo a bad experience. Up till now, 
I hadn't really been sexually molested in the strictest sense. Just my mouth 
had been violated. But now, it would be my vagina. 

I was truly frightened. 

He relaxed, then, took out the bottle of scotch, and drank some more, 
meanwhile telling me that I was lucky to have my first sex experience with a 
grown guy, and not a pimpled kid, who didn't know which way to put his cock. 

"After we get through, you'll know what to expect from a guy. You won't 
waste your time with the little pimpled kids." 

I was thinking that I preferred to be with the pimpled kids. 

So, he talked for a while of this and that, sort of relaxing. Then, he told 
me that it was time to fuck. And, just to get it up fast, for me to lick his 
cock again. 

I just wanted to get it over by that time. 

So, I went down to his cock, and put it into my mouth. It grew hard and 
long. It was a miracle the way it grew in size in my mouth. 

Then, he laid me alongside on the backseat, spread my legs wide. 

"Is it gonna hurt?" I asked, all anxious. 

"If it hurts a little, don't mind it. Because, afterward, you're gonna love 
it!" 

He got it on the edge of my pussy, and pushed in. His cock seemed to 
instantly fill my pussy. A huge hunk of meat. He kept pushing and pushing, 
and each push gave me pain. 

He had got in where nothing had ever been before. And he had such a large 
hunk of meat, that the pain was very sharp. 

He got to the hymen, and it stopped him. 

He cursed, and cursed, and pushed and pushed. 

I wanted to scream, but I didn't I just gritted my teeth. 

Finally, while he sweated and cursed and pushed, he broke through. A plop, 
and I knew he had busted my cherry. I felt the gush of fluid, and guessed it 
would be blood. 

"Hey, we did it!" His tone was gloating. He rested for a minute, for me to 
get used to it, then pushed in, again, going all the way in. 

It was pain, lots of pain, with some pleasure, too. 

I was about to pass out from the feeling of that huge, monstrous cock in my 
virgin cunt. I really felt violated. Like some brute had stuffed me with a 
huge salami. 

But, now, that he had busted through, the time came for his fun. He grabbed 
my buttocks, held them firmly, and started a movement, of in and out. Over 
and over, in and out, each time that he did it however seemed to increase my 
pleasure. More and more. 

I found it thrilling, actually. 

I began to expect each plunge with pleasure. Because I could tell that the 
orgasm thing was building up in me. So, that, when he finally went off, I 
could feel the spurt of his hot juice, and I, in turn, went off, too. 

My cunt seemed to explode with pleasure. A terrific wave of pleasure that 
went all over my body. 

That was it! 

After that, he wanted no more of me. He dropped me on the edge of town, told 
me not to look back at the car or he would be forced to hurt me. 

Then, he drove off fast into the night. 

I didn't tell my folks or anything. I just feel frightened every time I walk 
the street alone. I expect an attack. It's terribly upsetting. 

CONCLUSION 

This girl has a lot of psychological strength. She was able to endure a lot 
that many other girls would have collapsed under. She did some thinking that 
prevented her from becoming hysterical. She kept her poise. After all, she 
was dealing with a rapist. They can really be violent. She handled him and 
herself well, considering that tough spot that she was in. 

Now, all she needs is the therapy that assures her the streets are not 
always dangerous. She needs therapy that will eliminate her anxiety. The 
prognosis is good. 

CASE HISTORY SIX 

SUBJECT: Cathy AGE: Sixteen 

INTERVIEW ONE 

Cathy was an attractive girl, very athletic, into sports. She even came into 
the office with a tennis racket, and her carriage was very graceful. She had 
red hair, light skin, and a rather sensual mouth. Her manner was distraught, 
and it was obvious that she had undergone a dramatic experience. 

Well, doctor, this happened just outside camp. We started out to hitchhike 
to town, me and my friend, Daisy, when Daisy said she had forgot her 
letters, and wanted to go back for them. 

I said that I'd just meet her in town at the movie house. And so that, when 
the next car came by, I stuck out my thumb and the car stopped. 

This area has always been pretty safe, at least, I never heard of anything 
ever happening. So, the last thing that ever occurred to me was that it 
would be dangerous to thumb a ride. 

Well, when I got into the car, I realized that I had actually got in with a 
stranger, and that it had been stupid to hitch without a friend. There is 
safety in numbers. 

The man was about forty, rugged looking, and obviously not from the 
neighborhood. Someone passing through. He smiled at me pleasantly, and said, 
"It's a nice day." 

"Sure is. And thanks for the lift." 

He smiled. "Oh, it's a pleasure to give a lift to someone like you." 

I had to smile. "Thank you." 

"You are at just about the perfect time of your life," he said."How old? 
Seventeen?" 

"Sixteen." 

"Sweet sixteen. The best age of the life for a girl." 

"I don't know. It can be a drag, sometimes, being this young. You sort of 
have to wait for the good things to happen." 

He drove slowly and glanced over, to study me. 

"I can't imagine that you should wait for any good things to happen. You can 
make them happen. Even now." 

"Well. I'm not sure of that. Marriage, that's one of the good things." 

He laughed. "Can a kid of sixteen be thinking of marriage already? You need 
to have a lot of sex before you get married. Don't you?" 

That em harassed me. It was none of his business. But he was being direct. I 
thought that I'd be, too. 

"Well, I believe a girl shouldn't get into sex before marriage. That's the 
way I've been brought up." 

"Oh, that's a bad mistake," he said, driving very slowly, as if he was in no 
hurry to get anywhere. 

"The more experience you have with guys before marriage, the less error you 
make when you finally do get married." 

I shrugged my shoulders. I was a virgin, myself, and I just didn't want to 
get into a discussion of such matters with a perfect stranger. 

"Actually, I can think of no greater error for a young girl to make than to 
get involved with some guy before she's had sex with him. You check it out. 
All the newest sex theories say that. Don't you agree?" 

"No. I don't agree. I think a girl should come to her husband a virgin. It 
makes for a more secure marriage. He knows that you haven't fooled around 
before. He expects you to be faithful. And it works out. That's my mother's 
teaching, and she's been married for forty years. They have a happy 
marriage, too. My parents." 

"I think you're dead wrong. I don't want you to make that mistake, young 
lady. In fact, I think it's my duty to prevent you from making a bad 
mistake." 

He had turned off the road to town, and taken a different side road that was 
into the country. 

"Look! I think you've missed the road to town." 

"Oh, that's right. Well, don't worry. We'll get it straight. There must be 
another road up ahead that brings us back." 

But there was no road like that ahead. It all seemed strange to me, the 
whole terrain was different, more wooded, thickset trees. He saw another 
small road and decided to take it, to see if it led anywhere. 

I became rather concerned, mostly because of our stupid conversation. I took 
a secret look at him, and realized he was a tough looking guy, with a sort 
of strange look in his eyes. 

I wondered if I should be worried. He didn't talk as if he would act 
strange, in fact, he seemed to be very normal in his talk. Even if he did 
discuss the sex thing. 

Still, I was getting the wrong vibrations. He ha; stopped talking and seemed 
to be looking over the terrain, as if he wanted to find the right place. 

Not to get back to-the road, but to stop. 

I got terribly frightened suddenly, for no reason, and wondered what to do 
if he attacked me. It seemed impossible that he would, though. 

But then, he drove toward a clump of trees, off the road, and I knew I was 
in trouble. Why would he drive there? 

I wondered if I could make a run for it, when he stopped the car. We had 
really got away from any sign of life, and were far off the main road. 

It was a hot day, and the sun came down heavy, but still, you just wouldn't 
imagine he'd do anything in the daylight like this. 

I was dead wrong. 

For when he got into the tree area, he stopped. 

He turned to me. "You see, kid. I think you're all wrong about not having 
experiences. I think you should have them. Because it will stop you from 
making a bad mistake in your marriage. 

"I'm gonna tell you this. That I got married, and I was a virgin. I didn't 
know what a cunt looked like. I never even masturbated. I avoided the whole 
theme of sex. When I got married, I was a clumsy idiot. My wife thought I 
didn't know which side was up. She was completely disenchanted with my love 
making. She thought I was a cluck. And, within three weeks, she walked out 
on me. 

"That almost broke me up. It took quite a long time for me to realize it was 
nothing but my sex ignorance that was responsible for the stupid muddle. 
Now, I'm going to do you a great favor, kid. I'm going to introduce you to 
sex. I know it could frighten you. That you don't want it. But I want it. 
And if you resist me. If you fight me. Then it will much the worse for you. 
Because I'm just beat the living hell out of you. So, be graceful about it. 
If you're gonna be raped, just lay down and enjoy it Confucius said that." 

I couldn't believe my ears. By the time he had finished, I was just about 
ready to faint. My sex experience had actually been nothing. Just as his was 

I wondered if he was telling the truth. It sounded like the truth. But 
wasn't the cases different a man and a I began to plead with him. "Please, 
let me go. Please. I'm just a child. I'm too young for this sort of thing. 
It will ruin me. My whole psychology in sex, is to wait. I have never had 
any real serious sex with anyone. Please, be kind." 

"You're sixteen. You're ready." 

And then he grabbed me and kissed me. He was strong as a lion. There was no 
resisting him, even if I wanted. And I thought I was an athlete. But he was 
a powerful man. 

He. just pinned my arms together, and put his mouth on mine, and started to 
kiss me. Passionately. His lips rubbed on mine, then he forced my mouth 
open, and put his tongue in my mouth, pulled it out, out of fear, probably 
that I would bite it off. 

I felt mad enough, and tried to struggle, but his strength was overpowering. 

His hands went down to my shirt, and he unbuttoned it, carefully. I had a 
light bra on, and he just ripped that right off. 

He took my breast in his mouth, and tugged on my nipple. 

"Ohhhh, don't, please don't!" 

I tried to pull his head away from me, but he stopped then. And suddenly 
slapped my face, real hard! 

He stared at me. "Look, if you want me to get rough with you. I will. I'll 
knock you all over this car, if you're not careful. I don't want any shit 
out of you." 

He took hold of my tit again, rubbed the nipple. 

"You might as well relax and enjoy, otherwise you'll get a couple of black 
eyes, and you'll know you've been through hell!" 

I was shocked by his violence. Somehow I didn't expect that, but it came 
like a shot out of the blue. I wondered if he had other violence in him, and 
if my resistance might bring it out. 

I was too innocent. That was my trouble. Everything he did seemed to upset 
me. I was not letting myself feel. All that I thought about was the horror 
of it. That my innocence was being lost to a stray guy, someone I didn't 
know. 

That's why I was so upset. 

I started to do some heavy thinking. 

If I wasn't careful, I could really get hurt. There was no point to getting 
hurt. Any man who'd rape a girl would do more to conceal his crime, if he 
thought it would get him punished. 

So, it was urgent that I not be hysterical. That I keep a cool head. I was 
not letting myself feel. I was responding to him, as if he was some student 
trying to get fresh. 

And defending my virtue. 

That was stupid. I should remember that he was no wise kid trying to get 
fresh, but a grown man who could kill me, bury me right outside here, and 
they'd never find me. I mean, anything could happen. 

I would not fight him. I would go along with him. 

So, after I made this decision, somehow, I felt calmer. I waited for his 
actions. 

He seemed to want to suck my tits. So I let him do it. I no longer pushed 
his head away. I relaxed and because of that, I could feel the excitement. 
There is something marvelously exciting about having one's nipples sucked. I 
hadn't quite realized it. 

For the first time this was happening to me. I was sixteen years old, and 
nobody had ever sucked my nipples before. 

He was doing it, and it really thrilled me. 

He then told me to pull down my shorts. He opened them, and when he saw my 
red pussy-hair, it seemed to make him wild. He really jumped at that. He 
growled like an animal over a hunk of meat, and put his face down at my 
pussy. 

He began to kiss my pussy, then, mouth it, and groan, like it really excited 
him. 

"Oh, you have a real beautiful cunt. Red-hair pussy. And a sweet tasting 
cunt!" 

He got his tongue in me, and began to lick it. He stuck his fingers in my 
cunt, too, as well as his tongue. 

I was astonished. I had no idea that he would do such a thing to me. I found 
it thrilling beyond belief. His wet tongue titillating my clit did some 
delicious things to me. 

It was all such an exquisite experience, having him go down on my pussy, 
that I began to get interested in what else would happen. I thought he was 
terribly considerate, not asking me to do things to him. 

But doing things that got me excited. I wondered if this made him excited, 
too, or was it just that he wanted to get me hot and bothered. 

I felt a terrific turn-on, from what he was doing. But, while he did it, he 
was fiddling around with his pants. He was taking them off! 

Now, I knew it would be the real thing. I would have to confront his 
maleness. And all that. 

I trembled at it. I have to confess. For years I had kept away from that 
sort of thing, frightened by it. Terrified of it. Now, in a setting of 
possible violence, I would have to face it. 

INTERVIEW TWO 

So, it now began to happen. For he stood up, and showed me his thick hard. I 
had never seen a cock in heat. Or, I'm not stupid. I have seen pictures, and 
diagrams, and read about sex. 

But a real live, breathing, palpitating hunk of meat, just in front of my 
face! It was the thing in life, and just in front of me. 

"Kiss it, kid," he said. 

He wanted me to kiss it! I have never touched it, never seen one, a real 
hard, that is. And he wanted me to kiss it! 

I was shocked. But, then, that would be the situation from here on in. This 
guy would want crazy things from a virgin, and I was to pretend I could do 
them. 

So, I bent down and took it in my hand. It was so surpringly big. They 
always get big when they are erect, of course! 

I kissed it, because he forced my head against it. "Kiss it, you little 
cunt," he hissed at me. 

I kissed it, again and again. 

"Now suck it. Put it in your mouth and suck it. Like it was a lollipop. You 
dig?" 

I did that, too. I put my mouth over the head of it. The hot, scorching hot 
head of it. I took it into my mouth. It was exciting. I found myself excited 
by it. 

Especially, when he leaned down and began to stroke my pussy. That really 
made me fierce. Because he was turning on my pussy while I was sucking him. 

The experience seemed to go together. I enjoyed it more, when he did that. 
It was beautiful. I had no idea that I had been missing all this fun. My 
body was tingling. I never had such feelings before. They were all new. I 
had nerves in my body that I never knew existed. 

And it all flowed out of his cock. I felt the meat in my mouth, like a live 
thing. It throbbed. It was velvety soft, the skin of it. But the flesh was 
hard, rock hard. 

He got excited suddenly, and held my head, so that it wouldn't move, and 
began to arch his hips. He was literally fucking me in the mouth. He shoved 
his cock into me and just when I through it would strangle me, he pulled it 
out. 

It was just a tremendous experience something I never dreamed possible I 
hurt, of course. It hurt my mouth to have him jam that big thick cock into 
my mouth like that. 

He kept telling me to use my tongue on it. Over and over. And then he fucked 
my mouth, like it was a cunt! I could feel him swelling up. 

"Hold it there. Hold it there, when I come," he yelled at me. "Don't dare 
take your mouth away when I come," he said. 

I could feel him swelling up, and apparently something was about to happen. 
I had no idea. But he would come. I knew what it meant. He would fire his 
seed into me. He wanted me to keep my mouth over it, when it happened! I 
tried. 

And then he fired. I felt the spurt of juice in my mouth, down toward my 
throat. 

"Swallow, swallow, kid!" 

I swallowed. I pretended it was ice cream, and kept swallowing as each spurt 
of cream came from his cock. I kept my mouth over it, while it happened. 

A tremendous thing, really! 

Because, I think I swallowed every drop that came out of that hard, 
boisterous cock of his. I felt wrung out, afterward. His cock was still in 
me, but it was shrinking. Getting smaller. I felt as if I had defeated him, 
somehow! 

I had knocked it off! It seemed like a victory for me. We were into games. I 
found that so far, I had not been hurt. I had had my pussy licked. I had 
licked his cock. We were together for about half an hour, and were still in 
good shape. I mean, I wasn't dead or anything. 

I had learned an awful lot. No, there was no reason to get hysterical about 
it. 

This man, in his own crude way, actually, was initiating me into the world 
of sex. And it was nothing to be frightened of, if you had the right 
attitude. 

I waited for the next game. I was even impatient. I knew he would still want 
to fuck me. Why not? I was even ready. Might as well go the whole hog. Find 
out what sex was all about. 

I thought of our conversation at the beginning. He thought it would be 
better for me to have a lot of sex experience before marriage. To avoid a 
mistake that he had had in his marriage. 

Maybe that made sense. After all, if it was true that his marriage had 
wrecked because of ignorance, it might be a good idea to know what good sex 
was beforehand. 

And ignorance could do a lot of damage, if you thought about it. 

He was relaxing now. 

"See, how easy it all is. This sex thing. You can get a big thrill from it, 
if you don't fight it. I think you got a good head on you. That's why you 
didn't act like it was the end of the world, just because you come face to 
face with a cock! 

"You may thank me, in the years to come. Because you learned how great sex 
can me. If you got the right attitude. But, if you think it's a rotten sin, 
that it's dirty. That it's wrong to do it before you're married, then you're 
in a bag of shit, kid. Then, you really go down the drain." 

I nodded. I didn't want to contradict him. He was still a rapist, as far as 
I was concerned, even though he was peeling off a lot of shit about 
pre-marital sex. 

He had forced me. That is the key word. Forced. Once you use force to get 
sex from someone, it's nothing but crime. 

And he was a criminal. Someday he would be caught trying to nail some girl. 
Then they'd hang him. 

But I didn't have to make myself a martyr with him. Because he was sick, I 
didn't have to go off the deep end, too! I would hang in there. 

He had some grass, and lit a joint, and then passed it to me. I didn't like 
the idea of getting high with him. But I had made a decision not to cross 
him. Not to create problems. 

It was good grass, and I went up. I felt good. I even felt sexy. I was ready 
for something else. For fucking. Yes, doctor. Isn't it weird. I had been 
begging for him to let me go, only a half hour earlier. I was on the edge of 
panic. I couldn't visualize a sex experience. 

Now, I was high with him. I was ready for him to fuck me. I was eager for 
him to fuck me, even. How can you explain it all? 

We passed the joint back and forth and I was really floating. I liked the 
feeling. His body looked interesting to me. 

I was annoyed now, that his cock was not erect. I wanted it erect, so that 
he would do something to me. I almost flicked my finger at it, to show my 
contempt for the fact that it was not erect. 

It seemed an act of coldness to me. That I didn't turn him on. 

"Now, we fuck," he said at last. 

It's about time, I thought. 

I was absolutely eager to have the experience, would you believe it, doctor. 
Some magic that he had done, made me, a screaming virgin, ready to scream to 
get my cherry busted! 

How was that for a weird picture, doctor? 

"Now, you have never been fucked, so it may give you a bit of pain. But 
don't go on about it. Just keep taking my cock in. And don't try to stop me 
from going in. No matter how tight you are, cunt, you're going to get all of 
my cock. It's the way it's going to be. If you stop me, we'll just get nasty 
and knock you around. I'd hate to do anything to spoil your good looks." 

You see, doctor, after all, he was just a rapist, and it was stupid for me 
to think he was anything else. 

He made me lie on my back on the back set, and he kneeled between my thighs, 
lifted my legs wide, so that he could get in easy. If he could get in. 

I was worried that I would bleed a lot. That he might be blocked and get 
very rough and tear me apart. I worried about a lot of things. But part of 
me, the sinful part, was saying, 'well, Cathy, it's time for you to lose 
your cherry anyway. So what if it's a man! Instead of a boy. Better that 
way.' 

He put his cock at my pussy, smiled at me, and then wiggled his cock into 
the aperture. I was tight. He could tell that in a minute. 

"You're a virgin all right," he said, happily. 

I suppose he liked to bust cherries. There are some weird guys like that, 
I've heard. I should think that most men would hate to get involved with all 
that blood and guts! 

He pushed his hard cock into me. It was like a iron pipe going in. I felt it 
going into my pussy, a hard slab of meat, filling me up, slowly. 

He didn't go into me roughly. He would push a bit, then stop. Push then 
stop. He was a considerate rapist, if you think about it! 

Then, he got to the blocked part. He pushed, but he could go no further. He 
began to curse. 

"Jesus, you got a tight crotch, kid. You got a hymen about an inch thick." 

Hymen. He meant my maidenhead, I suppose. Well, what of it. Nature was 
protecting girls. 

He pushed. It hurt bad. But I gritted my teeth. It was like being operated 
on! 

I began to hate him, just because he was forcing his cock into me. It wasn't 
any pleasure. It was just one big hurt. His cock was pushing ahead, like a 
tractor. Everything in front of it was folding. My felt in front of his cock 
was caving in. he was gashing my flesh with the knife of his cock! 

I relaxed as much as I could, breathing deeply, because I could tell that he 
was about to make a terrific push. He wanted to break through with his 
plunge. He grabbed my buttocks in his strong hands, held it firmly, went 
back with his ass, then plunged in! 

I screamed! 

He had broke through. I could feel the wet stream of blood in me pouring 
out. He had broke my cherry! I was no longer a virgin. I felt a terrible 
rush of melancholy. A depression. I felt terrible, that my cherry had gone 
to a total stranger, a brute who gave me a lift one summer day. 

Okay, I would roll with the punches. 

But, he had just started. Because now, that he had depth, he started to fuck 
me. He plunged in and out of me, coming almost all the way out then going 
all the way down. He banged his balls against my ass. He really fucked as 
hard as he could. 

And before I knew what was happening, he blew his cork. He came! The 
friction of my tight cunt was too much for his cock. He went off like a 
gusher. 

I could feel the juice fill my torn up cunt! It was over, just like that. 

I could scarcely tell if I had even an inch of pleasure. 

But he was in heaven. That was clear! He got his gun. And got cherry, too. 
He thought it was beautiful. Told me so. 

Said, that he had done his job for me, sweet bitch. That now, I would know 
what a good fuck was like. That my experience would stop me from making an 
ass of myself! 

But where am I now, doctor? I feel unimportant without my virginity. I think 
that I am worthless. I have been ruined. I am depressed. 

CONCLUSION 

This girl overrated the virgin thing, like some old fashioned girls do. She 
came out of a disturbing experience, with just a little depression. Mostly, 
because she felt the loss of virginity had diminished her. Therapy will give 
her reassurance on this. She will learn that virginity can be a mental 
thing. The right attitude will restore her gayety and self confidence, 
again. If looked at correctly, she could take pride in the fact that she 
handled a seriously disturbing experience with good poise, with a lot of 
mental health. 

CASE HISTORY SEVEN 

Subject: Olga O. Age: Thirty-seven. 

INTERVIEW ONE 

The case of Olga O. was one of the more depressing ones with which I had to 
deal. She was a librarian, approaching middle-age at the time of her first 
sexual encounter. Given the late age of her devirginizing, as well as the 
rather sordid circumstances, it is not surprising that the experience was 
not without trauma for her. 

She was not a particularly attractive woman, although one could guess that, 
at a younger age, she had been somewhat pretty and desirable. In any event, 
it struck me as quite unusual that she had somehow avoided or denied her 
sexuality for so long a time. 

It is quite understandable, then, that she was highly reluctant to divulge 
any details of her experience at first, but she did eventually confide in 
me, and found that the attentions of a sympathetic ear were very therapeutic 
for her. 

She arrived a half hour late for her first interview, and was obviously of 
two minds about the whole business. But she did, as I said, let herself go 
after a while. The following pages give a more or less verbatim report of 
her account. 

You see, she was thirty-five when it finally happened. Is that strange? I 
suppose so, Doctor, but there were reasons, I suppose. 

Oh, not very good reasons. I had a number of chances when I was younger. 
There was one man, an accountant, who I met when I was nineteen and working 
during the summer between semesters at the university. He wasn't what you'd 
call an exciting man, but he was. . well, he showed interest in me, Doctor, 
and that was something, wasn't it? 

I mean, it wasn't that I was so unattractive or anything like that. But I 
was very shy, and afraid of men, I guess. I never went out much, I hid in my 
books. I guess that's why I wanted to be a librarian: that way, I could hide 
in books forever. 

But, this accountant fellow, he showed some interest as I said, and as he 
was a rather meek fellow, I felt it difficult to feel as afraid of him as I 
was of most men. And I was ready, you know, but it took me a while to admit 
it to myself, I guess, and by the time I did, well . . . like I said, he was 
rather meek, and gave up just when I was ready to give in. And I was a 
little too meek, myself, to give him . . . encouragement. 

Well, maybe I didn't like him that much, that certainly had something to do 
with it. It usually does, doesn't it, Doctor? (Laughter.) But, you see, that 
was always the problem. I was too timid to accept advances from men I found 
attractive, and too finicky to go through with anything with the men who 
seemed safe enough to . . . Well, basically, I've always been a coward. 
That's the story of my dull little life, Doctor. But there was one 
exception, and that was a disaster. 

He was a highly refined gentleman. I met him while I was working as a 
librarian at the university, I was twenty-five at the time, and my sexual 
frustration was . . . Well, even the word "extreme" doesn't do my feelings 
justice! 

Naturally, just as I was certain he was the one I wanted, just as I felt 
sure I had finally overcome my lack of sexual courage, he told me he was 
married, and I felt that I was being used, just a diversion, I don't know. 
I've always regretted my not following through, anyway. He was a very nice 
man, and even a short affair would have been something! 

Well, anyway, I just got more and more set in my ways after that. I stopped 
trusting any men, and resigned myself to becoming an old maid. But when I 
was thirty-five, just when I thought, for better or worse, I'd gotten past 
the time in my life when I could be susceptible . . . oh, I found out how 
vulnerable, how wretchedly weak I really was! 

And what a man to get entangled with! He and I both worked in the library, 
and that's about where our common interests began and ended. And even that's 
granting him too much! After all, I was at least a professional, with 
something approaching an education; he was the night janitor, and I doubt if 
he ever finished high school. 

He was bald, about fifty, and just another lost cause, like myself. For 
obvious reasons -obvious to me, even at the time he had never been married, 
or even had a real girl friend. He was hardly what you'd call a "good 
catch". 

Why did I let it happen? Oh, I don't know! You could hardly say that there 
were bells ringing, or rockets going off, or any of that. He was such a 
coarse, ignorant, lonely man. It was . . . sordid, yes sordid. Why did I 
ever.. . ? " 

Well, getting to the heart of the matter, Doctor, when nine o'clock rolled 
around every night, he and I would be the only ones left in the library. He 
was desperate for someone to talk to, and I guess I wasn't exactly saturated 
with social commitments myself. He used to talk to me while I was closing up 
shop at night, and I found him repulsive at first. But he hardly noticed how 
I found him, he was so desperate for any sort of contact, that the mere fact 
of his finding me was sufficient to provide him with some sort of small 
relief from his dull little life. Well, I was pretty cool to him, you can 
imagine! But night after night, he would try to strike up a conversation, 
and I would try to distance myself from him, and he would just try and try 
again. Finally, he made some pitiful attempts to talk about books with me, 
thinking that would be the one thing he might have some sort of chance of 
drawing me out on. 

His questions were so foolish, his enthusiasm so pathetic, I wanted to just 
laugh at him. But I couldn't do that, really. I mean, I had to see him every 
night, and the thought of the tension that would have meant, every night 
feeling him feel humiliated, or worse, feeling myself being humiliated by 
his contempt for my cruelty toward him, I just . . . well, like I said, I've 
always been a coward. 

Well, my contempt started turning into pity. After contempt, I guess that's 
what familiarity breeds next. So I started taking him on as a start of 
student. He was certainly eager enough, and I began to give him books to 
read, and then I'd talk to him about what he'd read. 

He wasn't all that dumb, he seemed to get something out of what he read. His 
eagerness eventually began to touch me. After a while, I used to take him on 
late-night tours of the stacks, showing him where the different types of 
books were stored, trying to give him some sort of sense of what a library 
was all about. 

It was quite a revelation to him, and I began to realize that I was showing 
much more than what a library was: I was showing him the dreary, pent-up 
substance that my life was. My life hardly existed except in that library! 

I guess the emptiness of his life made me see how hollow my own was. But he, 
at least, had this childish enthusiasm, and I began to need it, I started to 
look forward to my nightly lecture tours with that sad little man. 

Well, one night he asked me out to dinner. He was very awkward, as if he 
almost expected rejection as a matter of course. Let's say I was just as 
awkward, and that I fulfilled his expectations. At any rate, I guess I hurt 
him, and the next few nights, he slunk in and shied away from me while he 
made his rounds. 

I felt pretty terrible. I mean, why should I hurt this poor man? But I 
didn't want to please him too much, either! I didn't know how to handle such 
an embarrassing situation, and after a few nights of watching him cower and 
sulk, I couldn't take it any longer, and so I made a clumsy attempt at 
apologizing to him. 

Well, he didn't mind the clumsiness at all! He was all too happy to wag his 
tail and forgive. But then. I was really stuck with him. But I figured it 
could come to no real harm. I was mistaken, though. 

Well, I felt obligated to be his friend now, and I began to like the role 
after a while. I mean, he was the only person I really talked to at all, and 
that was something, even if it wasn't very much! 

But one night, it got to be too much, much too much! 

We were walking through the stacks, and he wanted to see some books about 
birds. He liked to look at birds, all the things he liked were like that: 
simple, childish. 

The thought of pulling out a pile of books on sparrows and blue jays and 
such equally dull business was a little much for me. I would have had to sit 
there with him for an hour, watching him ooh and ah at silly pictures of a 
lot of birds. 

So I thought, if I'm going to have to stare at bird pictures, they might as 
well be a little interesting, so I decided to dig up some old medieval books 
on falconry, something that would at least have a taste of a different world 
to it, a world that couldn't possibly be as dull as the one I was living in. 
I mean, what are books for? 

But the moldy old books on falconry were hidden in a remote and seldom 
visited section of the stacks, a section where a lot of crumbling, rare 
manuscripts and things were stored, that could only be entered by unlocking 
a metal gate with a key that only I had. 

He didn't even know what falconry was, but when I told him about how the 
medieval lords would go hunting with these trained birds of prey, and set 
them loose from special gloves to go chasing pigeons and other harmless 
birds and then to smash into their skulls with their sharp beaks, sending 
them dropping to the earth for the lord to retrieve well, that kind of 
interested him. 

He wanted to know what the falcon's flight was like. I tried to describe the 
deep, swooping flight of the bird, the way it would give a horrendous cry 
and then drop suddenly many hundreds of feet to smash the skull of its 
victim. 

That fascinated him. And I began to realize how the flight of the falcon was 
a very sexual. sort of image: at least for someone as sexually starved as 
myself. And sitting there behind the metal gate of this stuffy, unused 
section of the library, alone with this sadly eager little man, I began to 
wonder if I'd brought this situation about with some sort of desperate 
ulterior motives. 

I was disgusted with myself at the very thought. And then I began to fear 
that he might read my thought, suspect what my fear was, and not pay 
attention to the sense of disgust and subconscious slip that it held for f 
me, not even notice those parts of my fear, not even notice that it was 
fear. 

Well, we were sitting there for some time, Doctor. He was entranced by all 
the old medieval engravings of falcons swooping down on their prey, of the 
medieval lords and ladies dressed for the chase, and he began to ask 

I about what their lives were like. 

I started to talk about the medieval code of chivalry, and soon found myself 
describing the medieval notions of courtship, of the woman's place, of . . . 
well, he was getting more and more interested, and I began to feel terrified 
of 

I my unwanted, long suppressed carnal desires that seemed to be trying to 
find a way out into the open, into the very choice of topics that our 
talking kept drifting toward. 

I got a hold of myself abruptly, and made a quick end of our liaison. His 
eyes drooped, and he followed me out of the enclave with his tail between 
his legs. 

The next night, he came in with a bunch of wilted flowers, in bad imitation 
of the courtly behavior he'd seen the lords show to the ladies in the 
pictures in those books. I blushed at that, and felt embarrassed for him as 
he handed them to me. But he was so simple, so sincere about the whole 
thing, I felt . . . touched, I guess. 

I had to fight back a tear or two, in fact. His eyes were lit up, and lie 
asked to go back to that caged room again, he wanted to slip into that 
far-away world with me again, and I couldn't refuse him. 

I felt very hot and excitable as I walked back there with him. I was afraid 
those urges I had been so repulsed b; the night before would come back, 
would I stronger this time. But I felt myself walking to that room with him 
anyway. 

Olga drifted off at this point, and couldn't go on. She said she wanted to 
stop then, and I persuaded her only with some difficulty to agree to a 
second interview on the following day. 

But she did agree, and we set a time. I knew the second interview would 
probably be dreadful for her, but I felt she needed to work through the 
experience if she were to ever overcome the horrible effect it had had on 
her subsequent life. 

She was trembling when she left, and I expected she would be trembling even 
worse on the following day. I was not to be disappointed, as it turned out. 

INTERVIEW TWO 

Olga was late again, and fretted for a few minutes over some minor item 
which she had apparently misplaced, fumbling through her purse in search of 
it for a few minutes until I interrupted her dodge and brought her back to 
the main reason for her presence in my office. 

She grew red when I brought up the distasteful subject, but she began 
talking about it, nonetheless. In fact, once she started, she became 
extremely absorbed in it, and spoke without any significant pauses for the 
remainder of our time. 

I was careful not to interrupt the flood of her reverie. 

When we got to the cage where the falconry books were, he went immediately 
to the one with the picture of the falcon smashing his sharp beak into the 
skull of the pigeon. He stared quietly at it for a few minutes, his eyes 
aglow, and I noticed that there was a bulge beginning to develop in his 
pants. 

I began to breathe heavily. I was experiencing the same disturbing 
sensations I had felt the night before, but the sight of his male member 
jutting so grotesquely through his pants gave me a cold shiver. I couldn't 
take my eyes off it, and I was afraid he'd notice the attention I was paying 
to it and do something frightful. 

My leg was rubbing against his, we were sitting closely together in the 
small space, and an unfamiliar twinge of sensation became horribly, 
uncontrollably noticeable between my thighs. 

I felt that I would swoon, and fought desperately against the unwelcome 
surge of sensations welling up in me, and prayed I would find some sort of 
excuse to be rid of him, to leave that little room. 

Then, anticipating my flight, I took out the key to the gate to the cubicle, 
and while I fumbled it in my hands, I somehow managed to drop it on the 
floor. 

It made a clanking, ringing sound as it hit the hard marble floor, and he 
heard it and looked down and then reached to fetch it. When he picked it up, 
he looked at me suddenly, and saw where my eyes were directed. 

A wild, starved look came into his eyes, and he pocketed the key and put his 
hands on my knees. I gasped and shut my eyes, turning my head against the 
wall. He moved his dirty, calloused hands up my legs, and I moaned, and 
whispered that he must stop. But my dropping the key was read as complicity, 
and my staring at his erection without voicing my outrage was only read as 
further proof, and soon I began to realize that there would be no stopping 
him. 

Did I want to stop him then? Oh, I thought I did, but my body and my mind 
seemed to be arguing with each other. Having had so little sexual contact 
with men, I had no idea how to cope with a man's advances, how to turn off 
the insidious machinations of my own long thwarted instincts once they had 
been set in motion. 

Did I want to stop him? I suppose not, I suppose not. As his hands reached 
the hem of my skirt and went underneath to graze my wobbly knees, I still 
thought of resistance, but thought and action were opposed to each other. I 
did try to wriggle free of him when his coarse, insensitive hands pushed 
their way into my underclothes and prodded into my sexual parts. But as soon 
as he touched me there, a jolt shot through me that paralyzed me, made me 
numb and helpless. It felt so dirty, and yet . . . perhaps, in that moment 
of weakness, I thought I needed some dirt in my antiseptic life! 

I loathed myself as I heard some strange part of myself kick off my shoes 
and allow him to roll down my stockings and rub my naked legs. I sobbed 
uncontrollably as he reached up to fumble with the buttons of my blouse. His 
eyes met mine then, and I winced and started to cry as I saw the tortured, 
bestial longing in his suddenly wild eyes. There was no way he would stop 
now, I realized, and my arms surrendered to the inevitable and hung limply 
as he slid down the sleeves of my blouse, the straps of my bra, and began to 
fondle my tender, aching breasts. 

I was lying on the floor now, only my panties, rolled half way down my 
thighs, still clung to my body. It was cold in that cage of a room, and I 
shivered at his every rough touch of my body. I thought of the two men I had 
almost been with before, so many years before, and as I looked at this sad, 
hungry man, I felt how bitterly wasted my best years had been, how even that 
accountant was a prize compared to the gnarled janitor who was now stooping 
over me. 

That hideous lump in his pants soon lost one layer of the shabby cloth that 
had been hiding it from my sight. The change in his pockets, and the large 
ring of keys that he carried with him on his rounds, clinked and jingled 
against the marble as his pants sagged to the floor. There was no place for 
me to hide in, the cage had so little room inside, and I was forced to stare 
at him, my eyes fixed with horrid fascination on the swelling organ that 
seemed ready to rip his drawers apart with the powerful agony of its 
pressure. 

As he slipped out of his shorts, I saw, for the first time in my life, the 
swollen phallus of a human male. The sight made me catch my breath, I had no 
idea they could be so large, so bent and knobby, so seeming strong and 
all-powerful. My mind was unbearably agitated just then, and in my fright 
and fascination, I reached out to touch the oppressive, unreal thing, to 
convince myself of its actual presence there before me, to get some more 
than visual picture in my mind of what it was that seemed so intent on doing 
violence to me now. 

When I touched it, the sense of dirt, of filth, returned, and in its train 
came an urge to sink into it, to join the grime of his sweaty body to the 
clean and proper flesh of my own long suffering flesh. 

Oh, I wanted to welcome it then, welcome at last the embrace of a man! I 
wanted him to go slowly, to give me time to accustom myself to the thought 
of what was finally to happen to me, to give me the few moments I needed to 
make my body unloose itself and allow itself to feel this thing that was 
still but a tingling, a peculiar hurt, a perilous unknown. 

But this was denied me. Oh, I had a few short, mind-erasing seconds as his 
mouth drooled around the base of my nipples, making them protrude and 
tighten and grow electrifyingly tender to the harsh sucking strokes of his 
lips. But he only touched me briefly there, between my legs, he only began 
to start that fire, to get the kindling wood glowing, before he threw his 
massive log abruptly into the furnace. 

I had a few seconds of shock when it entered me. It ripped into me 
unmercifully, shredding the virginal, atrophied walls of my unused vagina as 
it angrily penetrated into me. But then, it hit the hard, ancient wall of my 
maidenhead, and I will never forget the violent death it died. 

It seemed to take an hour of battering before it finally was shattered by 
the stubborn ramming of that hard, cruel instrument of his. I bit my tongue 
until I drew blood, and then I felt the blood oozing out of my vagina and 
dripping in a steady stream on to the marble. 

Then, when I thought I'd been ripped apart, he stabbed me deeper, much, much 
deeper than I had imagined it possible. 

It felt so vile! I hated him then. And then it went still further! 

I knew there was no turning back then. At least I knew that much, and 
knowing anything in the midst of all those strange, unbearable sensations 
was a comfort to m But then, when I thought I had attained the most abject 
possible state, my entire shiver was rocked by a devastating surge of some 
totally unknon, devastating sensation. I tried to repress it, to turn it 
off, to find it ugly, bestial, but it was too powerful. As it tore through 
me, I surrendered without knowing how to its tortuous pleasure. 

I had never known such a thing. I had read so many books about this sort of 
thing, I had tried to form some image of it in my mind, but it could not be 
felt in my mind alone, I was not feeling it then in my mind at all! 

What is it? What is it? I kept asking myself that answerless question, until 
my mind could no longer ask, or formulate, anything. My mind was erased, my 
body had taken me over completely, doing a strange, alien dance that I felt 
myself performing without any sense of how, or to what end. 

Then something exploded, or caught fire, or dissolved, I don't know what to 
describe it as, but I squawked like a stabbed bird, like a pigeon just 
bludgeoned by a great, swooping falcon, and then there was nothing, nothing 
I could name. I seemed to fall, without there being any bottom. 

I heard him scream, and then his chest collapsed into me with a thud as he 
released a steaming load of alien substances into the sore wound he had made 
between my legs. I shrieked, and heard myself give a rattling moan that did 
not seem to be from my body. Then my limbs convulsed, and against my will, 
or what little was left of it still, all the bones and muscles in my body 
bent inwards and squeezed together, squeezed down to the throbbing source of 
all these unfamiliar acts and feelings, and then my orifice heaved, as if to 
vomit, and retched out a spasmodic stream of warm syrup that stuck to my 
thighs and the mat of drenched, bloodied hair between them. 

I was over soon, leaving me confused, shamed, and wanting more of it, 
wanting to know better what it was, what it could be if I left my body 
totally to its own devices and surrendered willingly to it. 

He understood, when he was done, how little I understood what we had done 
there. Even an inexperienced man, and such he doubtless was, would know. He 
cock, now tame and tiny compared to what it had just been, slid out of me 
slowly, and I could see how the blood from my body clung to its shaft. The 
sight of it sickened me. But it also forced upon me a burning memory of the 
pleasure it had just brought me, and I was hypnotized by it, unable to speak 
or move. 

Suddenly, years of pent up desires and unknown longings overwhelmed me, 
demanding more than the tiny morsel of ecstasy I had just nibbled on. My 
hand stretched across the space separating me from his implement, it grabbed 
it ferociously, stretching and tugging until I felt it swell again and 
become ready for more. 

There was a look of astonishment in his eyes. He became an animal, and the 
quickness with which he was able to cast of the shell of his humanness 
drained me of my last resistance, infected me with its crass animal 
cravings. My sould filled to the brim with lust, excluding all else from it 
as I hauled his prick back down to my hole and skewered myself on its 
stiffening blade. This time, I closed off all other sensation, I shut my 
eyes tightly and ignored my ears, hearing only the raging pulse of my blood 
in my skull, I drifted away from all those things I was used to noticing, 
and the previously atrophied senses of my suddenly raw insides. 

Oh! This time I drained the scum out of him, I used him ruthlessly for my 
own pleasure! My limbs, caught so unawares the first time, now took on a 
life all their own, a hungry, calculating will forcing them to seek what I 
needed then. I smothered him with the grappling violence of my uncontrolled 
yearning, I fought for every spurt of pleasure I felt ripping through me, I 
sucked the life out of his hard cock, gnawed at it with my ravaging cunt 
until my hole burned and dripped its dew on his groin. 

It was the only way to fight off the shame, the sense of years wasted, only 
to have my precious little box finally squander its long buried treasure on 
such an undeserving man. 

When he was done, he whimpered, but I rose, triumphant, rid at last of all 
that meek, retreating wretchedness that had kept me imprisoned in my 
virginity for so many years. Now he was the weak one, apologizing for what 
he had done, bowing his head, fawning, groveling and begging for me to 
forgive him. 

Forgive him! I had been awakened by him. He was no Prince Charming, kissing 
me back to life after an enchanted interlude and carrying me off to a magic 
castle on a white steed, but he was all my miserable self-denial had made 
available for the taking. And so I took, no longer ashamed, no longer timid, 
no longer too proud to make use of him and no longer so meek as to remain 
contented with such a frail specimen as he was! I wanted more now! Much, 
much more than the paltry lot in life he represented! 

I left him that night, speaking hardly a word to him, and went home to my 
mirror, to adjudge the hopelessness of my situation. I stood naked before 
the glass, testing the firmness of my aging breasts, letting my hair hang in 
so many different ways to find the way that did the most justice to the 
woman I wanted now to be. 

I found that I was no longer pretty, but that I did not deserve, either, to 
think myself repulsive. That night, his sperm still wet inside my cunt, I 
went out by myself to a bar. 

I put on the few pieces of clothes that approached the daring and 
suggestive: all gifts from girl friends on birthdays or Christmas, nothing 
that I had ever had the nerve to purchase myself. I had never gone alone to 
a bar, I had never dreamed of going to one in quest of a man. That night, 
and for many nights thereafter, I went out prowling, bringing home a few 
victims to service me, to show me those parts of myself I had so long 
denied, to force them to take command of my life, to turn me at last into a 
woman! 

I suppose you could say that one night changed my life. My janitor soon 
could hardly recognize me as I abandoned the repressive garb I had hidden 
myself in for so many years, as I began to pay attention to such previously 
ignored matters as the style of my hair, the frames of my glasses, the scent 
of perfume and luster of my lipstick. He knew what had happened, and could 
no longer bring himself to speak to me. 

I owed him my awakening, though, and would have paid him for it with another 
night of love, but he would no longer take it from me, he was ashamed, and 
had old-fashioned visions of himself as the man who had destroyed me, 
brought me to sin. Or else, he may have wanted me for himself, and saw all 
too clearly that I would never let him have that! I was hungry for men for a 
while after that first, gruesome night. I felt sick about what it had been 
for him, and the humiliation I had felt it was going to turn into for me. 

I determined I would no longer remember myself as I was then, as I had been 
for so many wasted years. The word "fuck" no longer was the vehicle of dread 
for me: I wanted to fuck, and fuck, and fuck! And I did. Oh! I did! 

Ah! But soon I was at sea, I was run by my body only, I had not learned how 
to feel! One man, then another, never the same one twice! I was able to be 
free with my body now, but my heart was still a little lump of ice. Ah! But 
at least my body had found some peace! 

CONCLUSION 

I was pleased to see how well Olga was finally able to confront the tawdry 
memory of her first sexual awakening. The heavy sense of guilt and shame she 
had carried with her before was still with her, now in the form of her 
inability to form more than a one night involvement with any man. But she 
had become aware of the problem through her confronting the memory of its 
source in our interviews, and I was happy to refer her to help. 

She has, since the time of our talks, entered into sexual therapy at Esalen, 
and soon began to involve herself on a less shallow basis with a number of 
men she met there. 

The last I heard from her, she was living with three men and another woman 
in a loosely structured "group marriage" of sorts. I feel she has made 
considerable progress toward evolving her capacity for significant 
relationships, and look forward to her continuing growth. 

CASE HISTORY EIGHT 

Subject: Ruby D. Age: Thirteen 

INTERVIEW ONE 

Ruby was not yet into her teens when she lost her virginity. Ruby was also 
not sure which of a number of young boys she had, in fact, technically lost 
it to: all she knew for sure was that it was one of the six teens who took 
turns abusing her on the long night during which her hymen was busted 
forever. 

One would expect that in a girl of such tender age, and under such frightful 
circumstances, the psychic damage would have been virtually irreparable. But 
such was not the case with Ruby. 

If anything, she had quite the opposite problem to contend with than the one 
we should expect. Ruby, in fact, had quickly made herself the terror of her 
school. 

The frankness of her unabashed lust was astonishing, and I at first thought 
there was no hope of bringing her back to her senses. Her lewd history is 
given in her own words below. 

Well, Doctor, you could sort of say I did it on a dare. I mean, I didn't 
know for sure what was going to happen, but I got the general idea in time 
to back out, but shit! I wasn't gonna be a chicken! I knew I was the hottest 
little number in my class, and I'll be damned if I was gonna let some other 
girl have all the fun before I'd had any! 

It started as a sort of contest between me and Merryl. She's the co-captain 
of the junior high cheer-leaders, me being the other co-captain, of course! 
And Greg was the captain of the football team, and Merryl and I were daring 
each other to get up the nerve to be the first one to go down with him. 

Of course, we didn't really know what "going down" meant at first. But the 
older girls had given us an idea. And we figured Greg and the other studs on 
the team had more than an idea, and would help us do whatever was necessary! 

As it turned out, naturally, they were more than just willing! Greg was the 
one who brought me to the post-game party at Ted's house. I figured Merryl 
and the rest of the girls would be there, too, but I'll admit I was a bit 
surprised to find the whole team there, and none of the girls' there except 
me and Merryl! I guess you can sort of figure what I meant about it all sort 
of happening as a dare, huh, Doctor? 

Well, anyway, it was the last game of the season, and if we won it, we were 
gonna be in at least a tie for the state championship. Well, we were playing 
that last game at home, and the atmosphere was really tense, let me tell 
you, and what do you know but Greg and the boys beat the stuffing out of 
those other guys, getting five touchdowns to their none! 

Well, we knew that Greg and the guys were all fooling around with the senior 
cheer-leaders, and us junior high girls wanted to show those older bitches 
that we weren't just a bunch of kids! I knew that Greg and Ted and the rest 
had all been eyeing me and Merryl, we already had tits as big as the older 
girls', and nobody else had had a throw with us yet, so we were something 
new and tasty for them to try! 

Well, me and Merryl didn't dig the drippy kids in our own grade, we wanted 
to get it on with those bigger, tougher guys on the team! We figured that 
would be some coup all right, and me and Merryl had been playing up to those 
studs for a few weeks before the big game. We sure let 'em know we were game 
to try something, and we just hoped they wouldn't think we were a couple of 
dumb little brats who didn't know from nothing. 

So anyway, after the game, Greg and Ted invited me and Merryl out to Ted's 
place tot a victory celebration, and the four of us drove out there in 
Greg's Chevy and drank a few beers on the way. We drank more than a few, in 
fact, 'cause Greg took a detour through the woods and parked by the lake for 
a while and then took out some Ripple. We got roaring drunk, and while Ted 
had Merryl in the back seat, Greg started feeling for my tits! 

Well! I could see in the rear view mirror that Ted was doing the same with 
Merryl, and I wasn't gonna be the chicken, so I let Greg feel my boobs and 
then I saw that Ted was going for Merryl's pants. She got a little nervous 
about that, so I decided that was my cue, all right! 

I lifted up my dress myself, and Greg got down there fast enough! I grabbed 
at his cock, it was rubbing fast and hard against my leg, so I unzipped his 
fly and stroked that thing of his until it shot off. It didn't take him long 
either, and I was really surprised to finally see one of those things, and 
especially to see what a scrumptious mess it could make all over the 
dashboard! 

Well, Merryl could sure hear Greg getting off, he made a lot of noise, and I 
could sure see her getting uptight in the back seat with Ted, so I knew I 
had one up on her already, and was looking forward to really putting her in 
her place at the party! 

Ted was getting really horny, and Merryl was afraid to grab for his dick, 
and that got him really grouchy! When she knew I'd already had a few good 
tugs at Greg's, she got livid, let me tell you! She tried to make up lost 
ground with Ted, but he was pissed off by that time and slapped her a couple 
times when she tried to grope him after she'd already said her no no no's 
once too often. 

Well, Greg figured he's got his, and too bad for Ted, so he patched out down 
the road to the lake and headed for Ted's place for the party. He asked me 
did I know how to suck cock, and I lied and said yes, because I was sure I 
could figure it out, which I did in no time! 

He unzipped his fly and yanked his dong out at the first red light, and I 
figured sucking meant putting it in my mouth, which is what I did, and then 
I felt the thing get real big and just did his lollipop till I got the sugar 
out, if you know what I mean, and that didn't take longer than the time to 
the green light! 

I figured, what with Greg coming off so fast, he must be really horny, and I 
wondered what was next! I was already up on Merryl by a hand job and a blow, 
so I knew she'd really have to think of something fast if she was gonna make 
me look slow! So then I figured, hell, soon as we get in that door, I'll 
make Greg read loud and clear how I want to get down to the basics without 
wasting any time, and that'll stop Merryl's clock but good! 

Well, on the way to the celebration, Merryl finally got up the courage to 
shove her hand in and get some glob all over it for her troubles, and then 
Ted wasn't so grouchy, and then she started toying with his doodad and got 
her mouth into the action just in time for Greg to pull up in front of Ted's 
with a screech of the breaks that forced Merryl's jaws to jar and nearly 
made her bite off Ted's swollen prick! 

Boy, that really pissed him off! I laughed my tits off while I watched him 
jump up and down in the seat with his wounded cock in his left hand and 
Merryl's face getting slapped crimson with his right! That little scene, 
plus the way we were all so drunk, and especially me, I'd reckon, well, that 
set the stage for what happened inside. 

Greg had his cock back in his pants by now, and got out of the car and 
opened my door and grabbed my hand and pulled me out after him while Ted did 
the same sort of number on Merryl, except he was pretty sore at Merryl what 
with her almost biting his cock off and all, so he didn't just pull her out, 
he sort of kicked her ass a few times and dragged her! 

Well, I really felt high as a kite when I saw Merryl getting hers! I knew I 
was going to show her a thing or two inside, although I still wasn't all 
that sure just what it was gonna be, but I figured that was Greg's job to 
show me, so I wasn't gonna get uptight about it like that dumb bitch Merryl! 
No way! 

Well, we get inside, and we hear a lot of noise and see a lot of smoke, and 
what do I catch is happening but that the whole football team is there, but 
there ain't no twats but me and Merryl, and Merryl was already just about 
out of it after the miserable showing she'd put on in the back seat with 
Ted! 

This is it, I said to myself, I'm gonna do whatever it is right here in 
front of all the boys and Merryl, too! She'll never live it down, I laughed 
to myself, though I must admit she did give it the old high school try once 
she saw me going at it. But she just didn't have the staying power, poor 
tight little pussy that she is! 

And of course, nothing happened at first. Greg and Ted, and especially Greg, 
gave these shit-eating grins to the other guys, Greg sucking his lips and 
wiggling his hollow fist up and down to let the guys know what the score 
was! 

I felt really sort of privileged, like, when Greg had me sit down next to 
him and he put his hand over my twat for everybody to see. Ted only put his 
hand over Merryl's boobs, and I knew she felt like I'd shown her up, she was 
really blushing and babbling, let me tell you! 

Greg's stroking my pussy for a while, while he's grunting with the boys, and 
all of a sudden Harry, who's one of the tackles, shoves a fat cigarette in 
my mouth and tells me how I should take a big puff on the thing and hold it 
in. 

Well, I'd never smoked cigarettes before, being afraid of getting cancer and 
all, except for once in the girl's room 'cause Merryl and some of the other 
girls were doing it to show how cool they were, and I couldn't let them get 
away with that! But even without being a tobacco fiend, I knew that this 
stuff wasn't your everyday North Carolina leaf! This must be that "pot" 
stuff they always talk about in "Rolling Stone" and the Johnny Carson Show, 
I figured, and waited to see what sort of savage stuff it would do to me. 

Didn't take long to find out. My head took off in orbit around Mars or some 
place, and I remember looking at my watch at eight o'clock, and then wanting 
to check the time about an hour later, except that it wasn't an hour later, 
it was only five past eight, which really blew me out when I realized what 
was happening to my poor scrambled little brain! 

So anyway, I smoked a bunch of this pot, see, and all the while I was 
keeping my evil eye on Merryl, and I could see she wasn't taking it too 
good, and was really getting kind of silly, and Ted was sort of laughing at 
her and slapping her tits around and watching the startled, empty look that 
kept jumping out of her eyes every time her titties bounced. I guess it was 
sort of a silly thing for Ted to be doing, even if he was the leading ground 
gainer on the offensive line, but he was really stoned, too, so just chalk 
it up to being wasted, is how I look at it! 

Well, this pot did a few other things to me, too, let me tell you! The first 
thing I notice after that five after eight business, I roll my eyes around 
the guys all gathered there, and notice they've all got stiff ones now, and 
the sight of so many cocks all hard and eager all at once really sent my 
head into a tail-spin I didn't think I'd be able to pull out of! 

I really felt overpowered by the sense of all that raunchy maleness so ripe 
for the plucking and sucking, and I began to get itchy in the tubes, and 
especially what with Greg stroking my snatch still, and I started to think 
maybe his stroking and my itching were connected, and maybe his cock could 
do a job of dusting my rug, that that must be what fucking was all about, 
and I didn't know quite how you went about doing it, but I had a good 
imagination, and I figured better now than later, especially as I was so 
stoned and figured I'd really get my rocks off with my head so whacked and 
out of it! 

I took a look over at Merryl, meanwhile, and she was beginning to sniffle 
and shake her blown out little head around and around while Ted shoved his 
paws all over her blushing little body and then shoved his fingers down for 
some jelly and made her whine and moan out a few no-no's! 

That's it, honey, I said to myself, this show's all yours, don't let it be a 
bust! The guys could see I had the right attitude, they all started rubbing 
their hands on their crotches, but nobody slipped out his dong, 'cause they 
all knew I was Greg's bitch that night, and they didn't want to make ass 
holes of themselves jumping the gun on the team captain, right? 

So that meant it was up to Greg, but Greg was too stoned to do shit, so that 
meant it was up to me! Wow! I was gonna be the one to do the number to him! 
Course, the problem with that line of thinking was that I didn't know really 
what J was supposed to do, that was Greg's job like I said, but then I 
figured if I just got out his whanger, no matter how stoned he was, he'd 
have to somehow get it together enough to do it to me, or all the guys would 
think the great big captain was just another turkey like the rest of them! 

Well, you can see I really had this scene down, and don't you start thinking 
I didn't know what I was doing when I pulled my next swift move! I was 
really ready for finding out what it was all about now, and even if Greg was 
too wasted to even stroke my pussy, I figured I could grab his hand and 
force him to play with my twat, and as long as his hand was down there, why 
shouldn't mine be down you can damn well guess where!! 

Ruby's language was unbelievable. For a girl so young, she talked like a 
brazen whore. I was quite shaken by the experience of watching this barely 
pubescent girl act out the most obscene situations and suggestions with a 
series of blatant gestures that had no place this side of the gutter! 

I knew that lecturing her on saving it for marriage or any of those other 
tried and true methods of alienating a wild young girl wouldn't accomplish 
anything. I had to let her have her way for a session or two, let her taunt 
me with her foul, unseemly language and not let her get any reaction at all 
out of me, if I was to have any chance of gaining her respect. 

I had had enough of her escapades for one afternoon, so I looked to my 
watch, and I found, with not a little relief, that the hour was just about 
up. I told her as much, and set a time for our next interview. 

She blew a bubble at me and pulled her tight little mini-skirt down from her 
hips, where its hem had been riding the whole time of the interview, and 
strutted out of my office. 

I was looking forward to our next confrontation with a great deal of 
anticipation, and not a little trepidation. 

It took me about an hour to recover from the episode, but after a stiff shot 
or two of the scotch I always keep in my bottom drawer for just such 
occasions, I recouped my resolve and felt ready for the next onslaught. 

INTERVIEW TWO 

I could hear her pointy hard heels clicking in the corridor that approached 
my office about five minutes after our next meeting was scheduled to begin. 
She strode into my office, and threw herself down into the chair with a 
lascivious swivel of the hips that brought her skimpy dress riding high 
above the thighs of her crossed legs. 

It was difficult holding my temper, but I forbore making any negative 
outbursts until I felt more sure of having gained her respect -something, I 
began to realize, that might take a long time to be won. 

She launched into her lurid description of her sordid escapades immediately, 
and with more relish than I found it easy to stomach. However, I managed, 
not without some effort, to maintain my professional bearing, and let her 
proceed undisturbed. 

Well, like I was saying yesterday, I reached into Greg's pants and pulled 
out a plum, let me tell you! The great stud grunted like a pig and was too 
stoned to get his act together, so I figured this was really my chance to 
show them all who really knew the score. And I sure showed them all, soon 
enough! 

I pulled on his thing and laughed at him as it got all bloated and heavy in 
my hand, and dared him to do it. Come on, Captain, I said, let's do some 
team work! But he was so blasted, all he could do was grunt, so I took off 
his clothes and blew him right there, in front of them all! 

While I was sucking on his thing, I kept one eye on my business, and another 
eye on Merryl. I was pleased as shit to see that she was still together 
enough to catch my act, and she really turned red when she saw me suck out 
Greg's come and let it hang out of my mouth like drool before I sucked it 
all in and gulped it down! 

Well, the great stud wasn't going to do any more for me for a while, but I 
could see how some of the other guys were more than eager to do whatever it 
was to my pussy, and pretty soon belt buckles and zippers were popping and 
whizzing all over the smoke-filled room! 

Merryl tried to make up for lost time, I got down on Ted's pecker, but while 
he let her suck him all right, he didn't pay her much attention, 'cause he 
had his eyes glued on the show I was putting on with Greg's dong! 

Pretty soon, Harry and Joel and most of the other dudes were out of their 
drawers and stumbling over each other to get at me. So I thought I'd really 
show 'em something, and I slipped out of my stockings and my panties and my 
skirt and just sat there eyeing them while I spread my legs apart. Now, 
whatever it is that's supposed to happen is gonna happen sure enough, I 
thought, and sure enough, it did, fast as lightning it did, you better 
believe it! 

I don't know which one of them porked me first, I was pretty stoned, and 
couldn't keep my eyes fixed on anything, what with all the excitement in the 
air, and all the whoozy whirling stuff that was going on in my twat! I 
couldn't wait to find out what that was going to lead to, not at all! 
Fortunately, I didn't have to wait very long! 

Like I said, I don't know who was the first one to stick it up me, but he 
really jammed a big one up there, let me tell you, and I was so stoned that 
when I felt that little flap of stuff go rip inside, I just rolled my eyes 
and yelled out, "Pop!" which made whoever it was do a quick ugh-grunt number 
and swill his suds into my snatch in nothing flat! 

Well, he rolled over and moaned, and then somebody else, I think it was Ted, 
put in his knife for a piece of hair pie, and he popped pretty quick, too, 
and that made Merryl scream and jump all over him trying to get it hard 
again so she could do it to him too, but he just belched from beer and 
shoved her away for a while, while Harry grabbed her and made her screech, 
what with the way he laughed at her and kept trying to jam her up, but kept 
missing her peep-hole because he was so wasted and strung out and all! 

Let's see, I think Harry tossed her down because he got tired of missing her 
hole, and then he came over to me and rolled Ted out of the way and took his 
turn. Boy! He had a whopper, all right! I got over the mere novelty on his 
strokes, you better believe it, 'cause I got into the motions pretty quick, 
and let me tell you, there's nothing like getting laid by a bull's cock like 
Harry's when you're stoned out of your mind! 

It was really some pin-ball game, I can tell you that much, all the lights 
blinking like bats under a sun lamp, and bells ringing and shit like that! 
Wow! And Harry, I'll say this for him, he was able to keep it up for a few 
minutes, and gave me quite a sloppy little ride before he blew his gasket 
and spilled his grease! 

Either Joel or Edwin did me next, and by this time my snatch was collecting 
quite a puddle of scum! Whichever one it was, he really got me moaning and 
shaking like I didn't even know was supposed to happen, but like I said, I 
was pretty stoned, and so I figured, well wow! so this is what it's all 
about, a pity I waited so long to get my cherry plucked, but at least I was 
making up for all those years I'd wasted! 

Meanwhile, Merryl was running around like a wet hen grabbing at all the 
deflated balloons of the studs whose jelly I'd spooned, and they were all 
pretty out of it by now, and just kept pushing her away, and that really 
made her feel embarrassed! Then Jimmy, the second-string center, wagged a 
pretty puny cock at my twat, and I pushed him at Merryl, and he was so 
worked up he just ripped off her clothes, and left her tattered rags all 
over the room and gouged her box till she screamed! And all that noise for 
such a small rod, and only a second string center! Boy, she's never lived 
that down, you can bet your jewels on that, Doctor! Well, so anyway, I 
remember there was six different guys that did it to me, and I know that old 
Ted got in there at least three times, and he even got around to stick it to 
that drip Merryl after Jimmy had bopped her box to his satisfaction, 
and-naturally, Ted thought she was pretty ridiculous, and really slapped her 
around while he worked off his juice! 

But the funniest thing was when Ted finally popped off in her pussy! He had 
had enough, and maybe he'd had too much, because just when he barked out how 
he was coming inside the world's limpest piece of jail-bait, he heaved and 
growled and threw up all over her tits, and some of his barf dribbled down 
onto her twat and trickled onto his cock, and that really pissed his off, so 
he stood up and called her a buck-toothed cocksucker and took a whiz in her 
weepy little face! 

I was really gonna show her now, I said to myself, and so I jumped up while 
he was still whizzing, and while I fell down a couple times, what with all 
those bodies being in the way and all, and me so stoned and so on, I finally 
got over tohim, and I don't know what made me think of it, but I just jammed 
my fingers up his ass, and just like that his rocks bounced as his bone 
stood up again, and then I wiped off the barf with Merryl's panties and 
shoved it into my hot little whang-grinder! I was still standing up, too, 
that was really something, and Ted just moaned and gave me this huge 
shit-eating grin and fell over on top of Merryl's hand I just squeezed my 
legs and fell over on top of him and sat on his dick till he squirted his 
sauce! 

That really did it! Merryl was hysterical now, not surprisingly, and crawled 
out from under me and Ted and ran off to hide in a corner where she clutched 
her tattered clothes and whimpered for a while. 

I decided I'd had enough of Ted for a while, I didn't feel like finding out 
if he had any more barf left, either, so I went over to Greg and rubbed his 
dong between my tits for a while till it got all swollen and gorged, and 
then I licked it and kept jeering at him, the big stud, to get off his ass 
and into my snatch, but he was feeling pretty sloppy and just made some 
silly noises and rolled over and snored. Boy, that made Ted and the other 
guys laugh! Greg's never gonna live that down, you better believe that! 

Well, that's just about all the action I got that night, except for getting 
Joel's dong stuffed up my crack a few seconds before Ted's parents and the 
police came in and carried off dumb Merryl in a blanket and started beating 
on all those jocks lying around lifeless like on the floor when they weren't 
vomiting or something. 

My parents came down to the station house later on in the night, and they 
were slobbering all over me about how their poor little girl had had her 
life ruined by all those animals who ought to be shot as a public example or 
some such shit like that. I don't remember if I said anything much, but I 
guess I didn't, 'cause instead of tanning my hide for being a bad ass, v 
they quick transferred me to a school in the next town, and all the guys on 
the football team got suspended except Greg, 'cause Merryl let out how he 
hadn't fucked her, he'd been passed out the whole time, so they just put him 
on probation. 

Well, I didn't stay out of the school for all that long, 'cause I whined 
about how I missed all my friends, and my parents are such saps that they 
thought my life would be ruined forever twice over if I never got to see my 
friends again. But actually, I just wanted to be back in the action and see 
how the social shit had hit the fan for Merryl and Greg. Ted and the other 
guys came out of it looking pretty good, and I got voted "Most Popular" in 
the junior high yearbook when it was all over, so you could say the whole 
story had a happy ending. 

Oh yeah, Merryl got voted "Most Witty", which really humiliated her, and I 
thought that was going a little too far, but that's life, I guess, and I 
can't say I really mind the ribbing she had to take for that, even though I 
didn't have anything to do with getting people to vote for her, although I 
knew all about it before she even had wind of it, of course! 

Well, Doctor, I guess that's what there is of my story, that's how I got my 
cherry popped, all right, which is what you wanted me to tell you. about in 
graphic detail and all that shit, right? 

So now that I've told you all this hot shit, Doctor, I mean, I've really 
done you a solid, right? Well, Doctor, now that I've told you all of this 
and confided all of my tale to you, I wonder if you'd tell me why you want 
to know all this garbage? I mean, do you go home and jerk off to your notes 
or something, or is this something scientific or whatnot that you're doing? 

I mean, not to be insulting of anything, but if you get your rocks off doing 
this sort of thing, it's all right by me, don't get me wrong, but I kind of 
prefer the idea of being part of some heavy experiment, you know? I mean, 
I'd like to be a scientist or something when I grow up, you know, and if 
this is some sort of science, maybe I've got a real talent for it, don't you 
think? 

Well, I can see you don't like the way I put my question, Doctor, I'm sorry 
if I've caused any offense or anything, but I'm really curious about this 
business, you know what I mean? 

But anyway, getting back to my story, I tried to find out which guy it was 
who was the first to put it to me, but I can't say I had a whole lot of 
luck. I knew it wasn't Greg or Ted, of course, but it could have been any of 
the other guys, and that meant I had about four possibilities left to choose 
from. 

When all the hot and bother of the so-called scandal had died down a bit, 
and when my parents let me return to the old school so I could mix around 
with the guys and ask a few questions, I kind of interrogated the guys I 
knew had been at me, but they didn't seem to know any more than I did about 
it, or so they said. 

Harry offered to fuck me again so I'd have some grounds for comparison, and 
I figured, well, why not, you know? 

Harry sure is a good lay! He took me out behind the bleachers after baseball 
practice -the football season was over by then, of course and he didn't 
waste any time fooling around. Now that he wasn't stoned or drunk or 
anything, he showed how attentive and careful he could be, and that's when I 
discovered what my clitoris was really all about! 

He was the team's best pitcher, and he sure knew how to use his fingers! He 
got me all lathered up, even without his thing having to be inside me, and I 
was moaning and groaning and begging for more. 

He gave me more right away, and unzipped his pants and pulled out his cock 
and wiggled it at me. It looked like it was about the right size, as far as 
I could remember, and when he put it in, I tried to concentrate on the way 
he stroked to solve the mystery. But I was already so wet and excited, that 
I just couldn't tell, I was pretty dry that first time, and there was a lot 
more friction, and I guess that made for too many variables for me to figure 
it out. 

Harry really shot off hard, and my poor little cunt felt like it couldn't 
hold that much juice, and I told Harry so. So he bent down over me after 
he'd pulled out, and started working his lips around down there until he'd 
got all the juice out. 

He was much too sensitive to be the one, I figured, but seeing as how 
everybody was so wasted that first night, that's not what you'd call a very 
convincing argument! 

I saw Joel again, too, but his cock had a crook in it that was really 
noticeable when he stuffed it in my crack and wiggled it around, and I 
thought that was proof enough it wasn't him. But then again, I wasn't paying 
all that much attention to fine points like that at the time I first got it, 
so who knows, really? 

I tried the other guys again, too, and had the same sort of outcome. That 
really disappointed me, I mean I would have felt a lot better if I knew 
which guy to thank for the initial favor! But you can't have everything, I 
guess, so I resigned myself to to an imperfect sort of knowledge about it 
all, and that's that, I suppose! 

Oh well, I guess time's up again, isn't it? Okay, Doctor, good luck with 
your research, and I'll see you later! And please write me a letter or 
something. I'd like to know what kind of conclusions you come up with when 
it's all over. 

Oh yeah, Doctor, one more thing. I ought to mention that Jimmy, the one with 
the puny cock, he kept chasing Merryl around after they let him back in 
school, and they say he knocked her up. She denied it, naturally, but anyway 
she had to get out of school for a few months to go to Puerto Rico or 
something, which sounds pretty fishy if you ask me! 

As for Ted, he's my regular fella now, but he's graduating next month, and I 
guess I'll have to hunt up someone else, I don't know, I haven't thought 
about it yet, he's going to college pretty far away and all, but you ought 
to interview him, too, you know, to get both sides of the story, you know? 

I mean, he wasn't the one who actually did it first, for sure, but he did it 
more than anybody else, and I think he was watching the whole time, and he 
probably knows. He tells . me he doesn't, naturally enough, 'cause he's my 
steady now, and it gets him all burned up when he thinks about all those 
other guys who were in there. But maybe, you being a Doctor and all, he'd 
tell you what he won't tell me. 

If you do interview him and he lets you in on the secret, don't forget to 
tell me about it in that letter you're gonna write me. It's something I'd 
like to know, and I sure enough have a right to, don't you agree? 

CONCLUSION 

Ruby's frankness was very difficult to put up with, and I needed a lot of 
time to consider her case if I was to reach anything approaching an 
objective viewpoint. 

Ruby seemed to me-to be a good-natured little girl underneath all the sass, 
and I did, at least, manage to persuade her parents to transfer her out of 
her school, it being agreed by all concerned excepting Ruby, of course -that 
she was in need of a change of atmosphere if there was to be any hope of her 
calming down and becoming a more civil young lady. 

I've heard rather gratifying reports of her progress from the authorities at 
her new school. There seems to be more than a little hope that her obsession 
with social status attained a high enough degree of satiety in the wake of 
her experiences at her old school, to allow her to develop a more mature, 
well-rounded, and individuated mode of self-expression. 

She seems to have taken her own advice about pursuing a scientific career 
with some seriousness. I'd like to think this means I made some sort of 
positive impression on her impressionable young mind, but that, of course, 
is not our central concern here. I must admit, however, that whatever my own 
effect on her may have been, I was very pleased, and not a little surprised, 
to hear of this welcome turn of events. 

The furor her case aroused initially seems to have abated, and her 
reputation does not seem to have followed her to her new school. Given the 
ribald nature of her reaction to the episode, it would seem difficult to 
imagine its leaving any permanent scars on her psyche. 

I most certainly do wish her all the luck in the world. Her parents tell me 
she has calmed down quite a bit, and while they thought it in her and their 
best interests to instruct her in the practices of birth control, they are 
of the opinion that she does not seem to be abusing the privileges that such 
practices allow her. 

I don't know if she will ever, indeed, enter into scientific work, but I 
think it reasonable to expect that she will continue to direct her rabid 
curiosity into ever more constructive channels. 

GENERAL CONCLUSION 

The cases in this book all reveal the repressed violence that underlies so 
much sexual activity. Older men, frustrated because of their life 
experience, often turn to young girls because they are vulnerable. They 
brutalize these girls with violent attacks, most often, eager to be the 
first sexual experience, finding in this violence against the girl's 
virginity some illusion of power and manliness. 

Some of the cases reveal an urge in the female to find a male who will 
exploit her, violate her virginity. 

There are women who yearn to lose their virginity, but dare not enter the 
sex coupling by choice, and therefore goad or lure a man to perform a brutal 
rape. In that way, such women escape the responsibility for a deep yearning 
to be sexually violated. 

It is a society like ours, where sex is either heavily repressed or 
stimulated by films and books, fashions, and photos, that seems to encourage 
aggressive sex. Especially, among men who have the least control of their 
sex drives. 

The problem, therefore, is one of a frustrating society, and a stimulating 
sexual environment. 

The combination can be explosive. It often results in defloration of the 
young virgin, and often in brutal sex exploitation. 

It is curious to speculate what happens in the mind of the young girl who 
has been deflowered. 

Obviously, there is serious trauma about sex. There is the feeling that sex 
is an aggressive, savage assault, one to be feared and avoided. 

Often, a girl who has been raped, may even avoid the entire realm of male 
sexual contact. May even lose a lifelong trust in men, fearing that any 
trust will be betrayed with ultimate violence. 

The quality of such lives is obviously badly spoiled. Such girls, when they 
mature, are often the prey of the Lesbian, who they think gentle and 
non-violent, more sensitive and less threatening. 

Not all girls, obviously, come away from a violent loss of virginity feeling 
like this. Some find the experience a natural experience, as if they expect 
that the hymen cannot be pierced except by violence. And they are therefore 
unhurt emotionally or psychologically by the forcible loss of the hymen. 

Perhaps Nature implants this expectation in young girls, so that the 
penetration is taken as part of the life experience, as childbirth is. 

Most females, however, respond to violent penetration with some kind of 
shock and fear. One reason that honeymoon nights can be either a devastating 
experience or a thrilling one. The gentle male, who tries to discover the 
feelings of the female, is obviously more successful in his relationship. 
Whereas, the violent male, who cannot control his sex drive, and selfishly 
gratifies his lust at the expense of a frightened female, he is the one 
whose relationship suffers deterioration. A marriage, in short, could be 
ruined, by one brutal night of defloration. 

To return to most of the cases discussed in this book, usually of a violent 
penetration of a younger female, it should be underlined that no two girls 
will respond alike. There are some who welcome the aggression, and some who 
loathe it. 

There seems little doubt that males who perform a violent attack on the 
sexual virginity, are working out some form of sadistic hate. Often a vague 
hatred toward some indistinct human being outside of themselves. Sometimes, 
the hatred can be something in themselves that they project outward, making 
a helpless girl the target. 

It has to be admitted that through the media of sex, all the most violent 
emotions of man can be played out. Forcible rape is in the center. 


THE END
